Ahh, ‘Baby Shark’, one of the worst things I’ve ever heard in my entire life. It’s not only not good, but it’s just catchy enough to get stuck in your head even though you’re like “I fucking hate this, make it stop doo doo doo-doo doo-doo.”
That’s where this all started, with PinkFong. That video has twice as many views as ‘Gangnam Style‘, by the way.
If you’re a parent, you probably think having to listen to that song constitutes torture. Turns out that the US justice system agrees with you.
USA Today reports three prison guards were charged with “cruelty to a prisoner and conspiracy“ for forcing inmates to listen to the song.
At least four inmates were subjected to the “inhuman” discipline in an attorney visitation room of the jail last November and December, according to the charge. The inmates were forced to stand the entire time, hands cuffed behind them and secured to the wall, the investigation found.
Charged were Gregory Cornell Butler Jr., 21; Christian Charles Miles, 21; and Christopher Raymond Hendershott, 50.
So it wasn’t just the song, the whole situation was clearly designed to torture inmates, a violation of said inmates’ constitutional rights.
But let’s be honest, there’s a reason they picked this song and not ‘In Bloom’ by Nirvana. It takes a lot of plays for Nirvana to become torture, and even then it comes around again and still rocks. The average person goes insane after listening to ‘Baby Shark’ zero to one time.
The post Court Agrees With Every Parent, Finds Playing ‘Baby Shark’ To Be Torture appeared first on The Blemish.
There’s an action movie coming out where Mel Gibson is a grizzled military contractor brought back for one last job and Walton Goggins is an assassin hired to bring him down, Sounds awesome right? What if I told you that Mel Gibson’s character was Santa Claus? Still awesome?
Fatman is by far the strangest Christmas film I’ve ever heard of and I watch The Hebrew Hammer every single year. The basic plot of “spoiled kid gets coal and hires someone to kill Santa” is actually pretty funny, but why does Gibson come off like a character from a South Park movie parody?
Honestly, from the trailer, I couldn’t actually tell if this was an action film, a comedy, or both. They’re calling it an action-comedy, but a little digging into the writer/director team of Eshom and Ian Nelms tells me this is going to be something even better than that: it’s a straight-forward, good old-fashioned B-movie schlock-fest.
This could end up being the Airplane! of terrible movies; Mel Gibson and Walton Goggins are fantastic actors and getting them to play something this stupid completely straight could honestly make this the best movie of the year. It helps that Birds of Prey was the only other movie to release this year, and that one didn’t make it to “so bad it’s good” and was just stuck at “bad.” Oh, and New Mutants, that was a crazy weekend. Imagine being the person who got COVID and killed their whole family to see New Mutants.
Fatman is set to be available on VOD November 17th, four days after it releases to theaters which, let’s be honest, it was only going to be in theaters for four days without a global pandemic shutting them all down. But so few movies were released this year that Fatman could win an Oscars in one of those categories no one gives a s**t about like sound editing, and I think that’s what we as a society deserve.
The post ‘Fatman’: What the Hell Even is This Mel Gibson Santa Assassin Movie? appeared first on The Blemish.
I never thought Britney Spears was a genius, but I also never thought she had the brain of a coma patient. Her lawyer apparently disagrees.
TMZ reports that Spears’ lawyer compared her to someone who was comatose in court when asked if she could submit a signed declaration of her wishes for her conservatorship.
The judge asked Ingham if Britney would sign a declaration so there’d be a first-hand account of her feelings. Ingham said Britney lacked the capacity to sign a declaration, and likened her to a comatose patient. He was not saying she is comatose by any means, but he used it by way of example to show she was not capable of signing a legal document. Ingham said even comatose patients can have their lawyers speak for them.
Now, I’m neither a lawyer nor a mental health practitioner, but as an opinion writer, I don’t buy it. If a family court judge can ask a six-year-old which parent they want to live with, then this judge can ask Britney what it is she wants.
Now, her lawyer should have her best interest in mind, and I have no evidence that he doesn’t or that he isn’t working on her behalf and for what she actually wants. But I also don’t think Britney’s capacity is that of a coma patient; I understand what he was saying, that it isn’t necessary for her to submit a declaration, but I also don’t understand what the issue would be with her submitting said declaration or being questioned by the judge directly.
The key issue here is that Spears’ lawyer has told the court she wants to be done performing and her father wants to tart her up and push her up on stage, which makes sense because I think how she got on The Mickey Mouse Club.
The post Britney Spears’ Lawyer Says She’s as Mentaly Fit as a Coma Patient appeared first on The Blemish.
Keeping Up with the Kardashians focuses on a pretty major First World Problem this Thursday night.
In footage released by E! ahead of the show's next all-new episode, Kendall Jenner and Kylie Jenner argue over some fancy clothing
The tension comes to an emotional head during a family trip to Palm Springs.
"Whenever we're in Palm Springs, we really just stay at the house," complains Kendall in this sneak peek.
"We don't really leave the community and it's always just chill vibes.
"So I didn't even really think to bring something to go out in -- I didn't think we were going to leave the house."
You see the major issue, right? The family has rented an expensive house in a posh neighborhood and, you guys, Kendall has nothing nice to wear out!
"I feel really underdressed, and I had said something earlier today that I didn't really have anything to go out in," continued to stressed-out 24-year old.
"And Kourtney was like, 'I have so many looks, if you need to borrow anything, just come into my room and literally take whatever you want.'"
Great! So what's the problem?
Kylie is the problem. She grabbed the exact outfit Kendall chose from her older sibling. UGGGH!
"I wanted to wear your brown other outfit, but then Kylie comes in and everyone bows down to Kylie and lets her wear whatever the f-k- she wants," Kendall says to Kourtney.
"I came in first. And you offered me those outfits first. So that's why I'm just like, annoyed."
Kim Kardashian then attempts to reassure the supermodel that she looks just fine in what she's wearing, but it doesn't help. At all.
"Like, I literally look like I'm going to f---ing lunch," Kendall says. "You guys are all like, going out."
Cut to Kylie, who is in the kitchen -- donning the brown dress -- taking shots of tequila with mom Kris Jenner's boyfriend Corey Gamble.
"You look cute," Kylie says as Kendall walks by them... rolls her eyes ... and storms off.
"Kendall! Oh, like you deserved the outfit more?" Kylie demands, going after her.
"It was for me!" Kendall insists.
Seriously, you guys, this is the stuff this family fights over.
More curse words are exchanged, more heated words hurled back and forth between Kendall and Kylie -- but come on now.
It's easy to see why Keeping Up with the Kardashians is coming to an end at this point... when these are the only storylines left for the writers to script.
Check out this clip for more.
If you want to for some reason.
Kristen Stewart is in this new shoot for InStyle Magazine, where she talks about things like her coming out, queer representation. She also mentions turning 30 so many times, you almost think she turned 35 and wants you to believe she’s 30.
There’s also a video where she opens some fan mail but probably not your fan mail, because that fan mail is with the proper authorities. There is a fine line between super fan and super creepy!
In the fan mail segment she hints at getting into producing her own movies, so all exciting things to the Twilight fans out there, made more exciting with a sheer top!
The post Kristen Stewart Answers Her Fanmail! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.
Now, she is combining the two with a very important message.
Lisa Rinna has posted a jaw-dropping thirst trap.
In the photo, she is wearing an eye-catching and festively colorful bikini.
But the real centerpiece is her incredible body. She looks better at 57 than a lot of people do at 27. Wow!
After those viewing her tantalizing display regained their senses enough to read her caption, there was a whole new reason to pay attention.
"So a lot of you have been asking about my diet and exercise routine," Lisa writes.
She reveals: "I start by voting as early as possible for #joebiden and #kamalaharris and all of the other democratic candidates."
Lisa continues: "Then try @isaacboots Torch’d class which will tone dat ass."
"So then," she says, "you can kick some white supremacists ass."
Lisa then correctly notes: "cuz the president is racist."
Lisa concludes her tongue-in-cheek but inspiring caption with: "This was inspired by @zoeisabellakravitz."
Zoe Kravitz is a total knockout herself.
Let's take a look at the talented 31-year-old's caption and compare the two.
"So, a lot of you have been asking me about my skin care routine," Zoe's Instagram post begins.
She shares: "I start by voting as early as possible for #joebiden and #kamalaharris and all the other democratic candidates."
"Then try some eye cream," Zoe recommends, "if you haven't been sleeping well because the president is a racist."
While no person could reasonably question the accusation that Donald Trump is an avowed and impassioned racist, some parts of Lisa's post are getting flak.
Unfortunately, like so many things in America, reality TV fandoms have portions that are racists and Trump supporters.
Though not (quite) all Trump supporters are racists themselves and not all racists are Trump supporters, the venn diagram of the two gets closer to a circle every day.
Some brought up Harry Hamlin's 2015 controversy, when -- as part of his Halloween costume -- he wore a swastika on his shirt.
Though it was a costume and not meant to convey his actual beliefs, some things -- such as hate symbols like swastikas, klan hoods, and MAGA hats -- are off-limits for costumes.
Given that Lisa's husband has not repeated this catastrophic error in judgment, he hopefully came to understand that it was truly a mistake.
Of course, the people choosing this moment to bring up the 2015 photos are openly acting in bad faith.
Why? Because they don't like Lisa's message -- about the importance of voting out Trump and voting in good, decent people who can undo at least some of the harm that he has done to America.
Instead, they are trying to distract from that by any means necessary. Calling out a swastika on a costume is a worthy activity ... unless you're trying to drown out criticisms of a white nationalist administration.
Lisa, Zoe, and millions of others are lending their voices and their platforms -- big or small -- as part of the courageous fight for the soul and future of our nation.
We all know what's at stake. We all need to come up with a concrete voting plan to ensure that we can take part in this electoral battle between good and evil.
Most of us won't be as hot as Lisa while we're doing it, but that's not really a fair comparison for anyone.
Paris Hilton is amazing, even though a lot of haters are trying to paint her as a racist I still think she’s iconic, even if she’s been problematic in the past. Don’t blame her, blame that PROVO boarding school that violated and tortured her or whatever.
A little known Paris fact is that she actually invented the Selfie, remember that episode of The OC she was in, she snapped a photo on her flip phone with Seth Cohen and the rest is history. So it makes sense for Paris to have partnered up with the ultimate selfie phone case called LuMee. To promote the collaboration Paris took some photos in a matching holographic outfit!
The post Holographic Paris Hilton! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.
Xtina is another celebrity who’s a big fan of halloween and this year she got into the spooky spirit early! The singer and her daughter Summer attended the Nights of the Jack Friends & Family Night on September 30th which is a drive-thru experience in Calabasas.
Christina got home and posted these photos that show her going from regular xtina to her spooky alter ego once October 1st hit. She’s also been posting some photos in her backyard wearing a figuring hugging black dress, keeping with the regular fabulous Christina we’re used to!
The post Christina Aguilera is Getting Spooky! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.
Hasley just dropped a new music video for Dominic’s Interlude off her new album that features a guy named Dominic Like. The video is shot on a tennis court and features Halsey doing some interpretive dance with one of the models. It looks like the video was shot a while ago when the singer was rocking her short bowl cut look.
Halsey dropped the video this morning after posting her conversations with Bernie Sanders on her Instagram. She had a ton of people in the comments judging her for getting into politics and a bunch of other people fighting about their political views in the comments. It was like a war in that comment section but hey it’s great for her social media engagement numbers!
The singer is also on the cover of V Magazine this month in an effort to encourage her fans to vote. In the cover photo Halsey is rocking her go-to freckled face look complete with a classic cat eye and wore her hair in a braided high pony!
Heres the new video!
The post Hasley’s Tennis Court Dance Off! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.
Newly engaged actress Lily Collins has been in the news lately after her new tv show premiered and received some pretty bad reviews. The show is called Emily in Paris and I actually tried to give it a go, but I couldn’t get even half way through episode one. I didn’t even get to see her arrive in Paris.
The show was produced by Darren Star, the same guy that did the iconic Sex & The City, so everyone was expecting something binge worthy and fun. The first episode is super slow moving with weird cut scenes that appear in-between every 15 seconds of dialogue. It’s really not great and apparently plays off a ton of stereotypes that just aren’t even funny. The Vox wrote a pretty good review on the series and calls it “a boomer’s fantasy of a lazy millennial’s life” which I can agree with.
Lily did a great job of talking up the series in this interview though, she really makes you want to like the show, it may be worth watching just to see the captivating Lily on screen for 10 episodes if you have the time! Read her entire interview with The Laterals over here!
The post Lily Collins The Cover Girl! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.
Summer is officially over but a few celebrities have been pushing the seasons, like Jordyn Jones who threw a COVID pool party this week! The singer wore a new tiny metallic string bikini and took some photos while partying, it looks like one pool was filled with soap to create some bubble action and Jordyn and get friends spent the day splashing around, posing for photos and doing some TikTok dances!
Jordyn was picked by Instagram to be one of the first celebrities to offer a new way of getting closer to your favourite IG personalities, you can pay something like $8 a month to access her “Close Friends” stories, where she says she shares intimate photos that aren’t seen anywhere else! Who’s signing up?
The post Jordyn Jones Goes Metallic! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.
Saweetie is a 26 year old rapper from California who went pretty viral after her song Tap In became a huge TikTok song. One thing that confuses me about Saweetie is how she picked her rap name, when her real name is already Diamanté! Anyway the rapper got involved in a new social media challenge that’s been going around called the Red Cup Challenge.
It involves placing a red party cup on your head and some how ends up with the cup on the ground and your legs over your head. It seems hard, but Saweetie makes this shit look too easy!
The post Saweetie Nails the Red Cup Challenge! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.
Hannah Brown and Tyler Cameron have a brand new message for their fans:
Sit back. Get your popcorn ready.
This is literally what the former Bachelorette and her occasional lover are saying in a revealing video, which has now been shared on Brown's YouTube channel and which Hannah has hyped with the following caption:
Tyler and I sit down and spill all the tea about what actually happened during quarantine... and where we are now. Get your popcorn ready!
Hannah and Tyler, of course, were spotted together late last month, sparking a new round of rumors about their status and causing pulses across the country to race in excitement and speculation.
What's their current deal?
Before answering that question, Cameron touched on their past deal -- specifically, what the heck was going on this spring when the two quarantined together in Florida with friends and then when they hung out during a dark time for Tyler.
“I didn’t want to do something because I was in a bad place or vulnerable,” Cameron explained as he and Hannah reflected on their time together in his hometown shortly after the death of his mother, Andrea.
“So I made a rule.
"I was like, ‘I’m not hooking up. I’m not doing nothing.’ Because I don’t want you to go away … and then we’re upset again at each other.”
Brown, meanwhile, confessed that they were still “feeling each other out” at that point.
Cameron, for the record, was the Alabama native's runner-up on season 15 of The Bachelorette.
The two briefly dated after Brown called off her engagement to Jed Wyatt... and everyone familiar with their story wants to see these two end up together. Forever and ever.
There's clearly a major attraction here. But also some hurdles, we guess.
“It was a pressure cooker situation,” Cameron said of the pair's quarantine.
"We were just under pressure the whole time and some of it is our fault because we played into it.
"We were having fun with it. … I was in a hurt place. You were in a hurt place. …
"We’ve gone through a lot together and this [was] our first time hanging out and I just wanted to work on it being a friendship.”
Hannah and Tyler filled their timelines in March and April with fun videos of each other; playing games with friends, drinking, dancing and generally having a great time.
But Brown says the two "never kissed" during this period.
Heck, she says the reality stars scarcely talked -- despite Cameron saying they spent “18 days in the same bed.”
Sort of weird, right?
“I think it was really hard for me and him just being like, ‘Let’s just chill.’ He’d always say, ‘[Let’s] figure it out,'” Brown says in this new video.
“And I’m like, ‘What are we figuring out?’
"I’m at my ex’s house with all his friends and I didn’t know where I fit.
"I think I did a good job of trying to be okay with the situation that I was in but I was internally freaking out.”
Just a few days ago, Cameron told Us Weekly that he and Brown had “struggled” to “learn how to be friends” since exploring their romance on television.
“We’re in a great place right now with each other and it’s great to be able to hang out, you know, grab dinner, it’s fun,” he said.
“Hannah’s an amazing person and it’s good to be in a better place than we’ve been.”
Okay, we guess... but then what is their status now?!?!?!?!?!?
“I think it’s just [us] trying to be cool being friends,” she says in the video, adding:
“There’s no pressure. It feels like it’s more on our own terms. … It feels kind of good to say it.”
We bet it would feel even better for these two to just tear each other's clothes off, though, right?
Come on. You know they want to.
In the same way that classic rock fans will debate the greatest guitarists in history (it’s Jimi Hendrix), or hip hop fans will debate the greatest rapper alive (it’s Jay-Z), comedy connoisseurs love to debate who’s the GOAT – the Greatest Of All Time – in comedy.
Secular atheists will tell you George Carlin. Faux-intellectuals will tell you Charlie Chaplin and his physical brand of humor. Fans of classic comedy will tell you either Richard Pryor or Eddie Murphy. Your edgy uncle will tell you Bill Burr, because he, and I quote, “Tells it like it is.”
But really, the answer to this query is quite simple. Who is the only comedian to have a career spanning four decades, among movies, television, stand-up, award shows, and whatever the hell 8:46 was earlier this year?
If you guessed Dave Chappelle, congratulations, you’re correct.
Yes, from his cult classic films in the late 1990s – as poorly as they may have aged – to the smash sensation that was Chappelle’s Show in the 2000s to the past few years of biting stand-up specials filmed for Netflix, Dave Chappelle is the undisputed GOAT of comedy.
Let’s break down why.
Longtime fans of the man himself will call back to his comedic career beginnings in the 1990s. Between stoner comedy films like Half Baked and his classic presence as a legendary stand-up staple in shows on both coasts.
Perhaps the highest success of this early era, the HBO-aired Killin’ Them Softly, showed a national audience early on why this man was a legend in the making. He excoriated gender roles, lampooned drug use in black culture, and even noted how his race was moving up on the social totem pole due to white Americans being so afraid of Arabs.
Chappelle followed up this masterpiece four years later with For What It’s Worth, solidifying himself in the stand-up lane as an icon. However, he had higher aspirations than just doing stand-ups, and those aspirations helped inform his cultural status today.
The obvious culprit is Chappelle’s Show, which ran on Comedy Central from 2003 to 2006. By the time of its second season, the show, co-created by Dave and comedic partner Neal Brennan, was the highest-rated show on the network.
It introduced the world to comedic rising stars such as Bill Burr and Joe Rogan, as well as revitalized the career of past legends such as Arsenio Hall and Charlie Murphy. Musical game-changers like Jamie Foxx, Kanye West, and Mos Def all played roles on the show, as did jazz rap visionaries like Q-Tip and the Roots.
Chappelle’s Show was at once a once-in-a-lifetime cultural phenomenon, a forum where the best of humor and music intersected, and a raucously cutting sketch comedy series. In just under thirty episodes, the series single-handedly crippled the sketch comedy sphere, as every poor imitation (Key & Peele, Inside Amy Schumer, etc.) fell so far short of the original.
Antagonistic comedy sketches dealing with gender, sexuality, fame, and especially race formed the backbone of Chappelle’s Show, leading to mass popularity and critical acclaim. Today it’s widely considered as one of the best TV shows of the twenty-first century, and one of the best comedy shows of all time.
Comedy Central understood the ratings cash cow that the show was, leading them to infamously offer Dave $50 million for a third and fourth season, which he declined. Citing creative exhaustion and comedic fatigue, as well as disillusionment with the show’s process and success, Dave fled to South Africa, quitting the show and leaving television for more or less forever.
The next decade was pretty quiet for Chappelle, who would pop up once or twice in a surprise venue for a show – or as part of a Kendrick Lamar routine at the Grammy’s. When he did eventually return, however, he came to burn down the house.
In the back half of the 2010s, Netflix announced that it had signed an exclusive streaming deal for new Dave Chappelle stand-up specials, at twenty million dollars per special. Yes, that’s right. Twenty million – per special.
Unsurprisingly under terms like those, Chappelle has been a busy, busy man these past few years, releasing five specials since 2017. However, if you’d think that his quality level would go down because he’s going from being a ghost to being one of the most prolific comedians of the late 2010s, you’d be mistaken.
Dave Chappelle is on fire. In fact, he’s arguably more on fire now than ever before.
Don’t get me wrong, I adore watching Chappelle’s Show reruns and putting in my DVD of Killin’ Them Softly (when I can find a DVD player). But if young Dave was a misanthropic, absurd satirist, ready to set fire to the world that has consistently screwed over his loved ones, older Dave is something else altogether.
In 2019’s Sticks & Stones, arguably his most notorious stand-up special in years, Dave spends nearly an hour lampooning cancel culture. He roasts Jussie Smollett, he compares the LGBT+ movement to a car where three out of the four people feel like they’d get a lot farther without the final person, and he tears into Michael Jackson, R. Kelly…and their accusers.
In Los Angeles, he chides the #MeToo activists (with whom he agrees) for taking things so far that the blowback has fallen on women everywhere, while in Texas he discusses the parallels he sees between the current opioid epidemic and the crack crisis of the 1980s – and as he says, he understands now why white people didn’t care back then.
This modern era of Dave Chappelle is lean, mean, and cynical. He’ll just as easily do a twenty-minute monologue with no jokes about police brutality, like he did earlier this year following the George Floyd killing, as he will make jokes about Lil Wayne lyrics he can’t relate to.
He’s an older, bitterer man, but still a comedian who we can all rally around for saying the things we never dare. He’s still the best storyteller in comedy, and this current era has proven once and for all that Dave Chappelle is the GOAT of comedy.