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Girl on Girl Bikini Wrestling From Delilah Belle Hamlin & Suede Brooks

I miss the days of GLOW and Foxy Boxing as much as the next guy, and thankfully there are some quasi-celebrities out there who like when we reminisce about such things. Take famous besties Delilah Belle Hamlin and Suede Brooks. Not only do their first names make them sound like a 70s SoCal duo recording smooth-ass music when put together and separated by an ampersand—Delilah & Suede—they also look hot as hell wrestling at the beach.

There’s nothing like a little girl on girl bikini wrestling action to kick the early part of your week into high gear, but there’s something extra sexy about it involving Delilah Belle Hamlin and Suede Brooks. If this were just two rando girls bikini wrestling, I might watch halfheartedly for a while before wandering on down the beach to see if any corpses have washed up on shore.

Because it’s two hot ladies that are marginally famous, however, I want all the details. I want stats, I want to know who landed the first punch, and I want to see one of these ladies get suplexed. Is that really too much to ask for? Some guys just aren’t content to have sexy ladies wrestling on the beach, I guess.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA / Splash News

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Who’s Hotter: Sexy Bikini BFF Edition With Reality Star Danielle Lombard and Model Jessica Crib

You should know by now that I enjoy a great bikini battle. Hot bod everywhere is how I like to enjoy the beach. I’m somewhat of an unofficial scorekeeper and referee when ladies want to go head to head. In one sandy corner we have the gorgeous Jessica Cribbon. In the other sandy corner we have the lovely Danielle Lombard. Cribbon seems like she was born ready in her bright yellow bikini. I don’t think I’ve seen a woman that looked so much like a seductive ray of sunshine until I laid eyes on her. She’s getting an 11 out of 10 from me. Don’t ask me how that’s possible. Ask her how she got so hot.

Lombard’s other name must be lady luck. Because she looks like nothing but good fortune in her white two piece. Forget betting on black or red. I’m placing all my bets on Danielle. She also scores an 11 out of 10 from me. Looks like we have a tie. You can boo about the results all you want, but giving out scores is something I take very serious. These women are evenly matched in the heat department. I’m up for a rematch if both contestants are up for wearing smiles and bikinis tomorrow.

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA / MEGA / Splash News 

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Jessica Edstrom and Claudia Romani Beach Babe Photo Shoot Together In Banging Bikinis

Whenever I hear someone yammering on about a “two for one” special I’m instantly skeptical. It always seems like you’re getting kind of okay thing and one thing that isn’t really worth much of anything. Those two for one specials never really seem like a good deal to me. The only time two for one is good thing is when it’s two hot models in bikinis doing a photo shoot together, like Jessica Edstrom and Claudia Romani teaming up.

That’s a two for one deal that really has value. Alone Jessica Edstrom in a bikini is super sexy. When Claudia Romani is rocking a thong all bets are off. But when you put Jessica Edstrom and Claudia Romani you are getting to equally hot things for the price of one. That’s deal, that’s a really good and sexy deal. There is no other time when two for one has any value. Really, Jessica Edstrom and Claudia Romani together in bikinis, in thong bikinis, is priceless. You can’t really put a value on something as sexy as Jessica Edstrom and Claudia Romani in thong bikinis.

Two for one deals are nothing. Jessica Edstrom and Claudia Romani in thong bikinis being sexy on the beach while wearing Santa hats is everything. That’s getting your moneys worth.

 

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA 

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Alessandra Ambrosio Keeps The Sexiness Coming Almost Spilling Out of Black and White Bikini Top

It seems like it was only yesterday—because it was—that Alessandra Ambrosio was out having the time of her life at the beach. Well guess what? She’s at it again. I told you guys that the life of a supermodel was one to envy, and if back to back beach days doesn’t prove that to you, I don’t know what will.

I mean, hell, even if you had to work like five or six days straight, back to back days at the beach is nothing to sneeze at. It’s a great way to unwind, and for Alessandra Ambrosio, it’s a great way for her to remind us how sexy she is when she isn’t cruising the catwalk.

If you think about it, it’s almost like a working holiday, only the work is going to the beach and being sexy. By the time these pictures come out, she’ll have the ability to write this off as a work expense. Can you even imagine how good that must feel? Writing off a day at the beach as a working holiday? What a time to be alive.

No doubt Alessandra will be out at the beach again tomorrow… or she was out again today and we’ll find out about it tomorrow. Stay tuned, it’s bound to be a working vacation at this point.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Supermodel Alessandra Ambrosio’s Busty Beach Day Cleavage

I would wager to say that one of the best jobs in the world to have is a supermodel. Sure, you’ve got to keep yourself at more or less the exact same weight for the rest of your career, but there’s no denying that models have the most fun in their off time of pretty much anyone in any profession.

Take Alessandra Ambrosio here for example. She manages to make absolutely everything she does off the catwalk look like the best time one could possibly have. She’s got that radiance and that look about her that says, “I’m constantly having more fun than you.”

I don’t know if that’s more a byproduct of being a model or if the good times have just followed Alessandra Ambrosio her entire life, but I’d like to spend just a handful of minutes in her company to experience just how great a time she’s really having.

So, whether the good times started rolling when she became a model or if this is just the way she’s always rolled, Alessandra Ambrosio is a true good time gal. I mean, just look at her. Don’t you envy absolutely everything about her, but especially how much fun she’s having?

[Go See These Perfect Body Volleyball Candids From Alessandra Ambrosio Over Here]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Man Wants Butt

So you guys wanna know the lowdown on this one? Apparently singer Jack Gilinsky, the ex-boyfriend of Madison Beer, was out and about showing plenty of PDA with an unnamed woman in a very tiny black bikini on the beach in Miami. Now, one gander at the spectacular ass on this mystery woman will clue you in as to why this gentleman seems so desperate to get his hands on dat ass!

There are fewer things in this world that get a man out of his element quite like a great ass. I mean, just look at what the thought of a great ass did to Al Pacino…

 

I think we all know the feeling when he says, “When I think about a woman’s ass, something comes out of me.” That something is your cocaine rage, Al.

So the next time you see some moron desperately flailing about on the beach near a woman with a great ass, remember that he may be experiencing this same series of emotions. You’ll know because it won’t be long before you’re joining in and the two of you look like a pair of howling cartoon wolves. Something about a woman’s ass, indeed. You said it, Al.

Photo Credit: MEGA 

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Model Claudia Romani’s Big Round Bum In A Perfect Thong

I’ve often heard the hardest thing for anyone is to draw is a perfect circle. Not a circle that is pretty good or looks pretty similar, I’m talking a circle that if you folded the paper in half it would be a perfect match. It sounds easy, but it’s one of the greatest challenges any of us could ever try. Though, I’m pretty sure if you took Claudia Romani’s ass, dipped it in ink, and pressed on paper it would make a perfect circle.

Claudia Romani’s ass goes to show you the challenge that comes with making something perfect, it’s all up to some kind of higher power. I’m pretty sure it took a lot of magic or whatever you want to call it to make Claudia Romani’s rear end. Throw that masterpiece into a thong and you’ve got something that there isn’t a word for. You can’t just say Claudia Romani in a thong bikini is hot or Claudia Romani’s butt in a thong is wonderful or Claudia Romani’s rear end looks like two perfect circles of awesomeness. None of that truly describes Claudia Romani’s ass.

So, maybe we should try. Maybe we should leave words out of this. When it comes to Claudia Romani in a thong bikini, we just need to look. Look at it, gaze upon it, stare until your eyes can’t look anymore, and then keep on looking. Claudia Romani’s ass in a thong is as close to perfection as any of us will ever see.

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Chrissy Teigen’s Beautiful Seat In Leggy Beach Model Shots

If I could make a career out of watching Chrissy Teigen I would. If anyone has any insights on attaining such a position please send me an email. I know there are all types of new job opportunities thanks to the internet. And if observing Chrissy ever pops up on Indeed listings, I would like to be the first to know. The woman has a nice pair of everything. A nice pair of eyes. A nice pair of legs. One lovely pair of hands. Anything else? I feel like I’m leaving something out. Oh well, it’ll come to me later.

I’ve come up with a list of things I rather do than be closer to Chrissy. And just as you’ve figured, it’s an empty list. I have no idea why she’s frolicking around on the beach in all white with no pants, but as the millennials say, “I’m here for it.” The woman is a gift from God. I’d lay down a beach towel and pray in the direction of her because she deserves, and is overdue for some worship. People might think I’m crazy for saying I’ve seen an Angel on Earth, but the beauty that Teigen possesses is not of this world, and obviously from a heavenly realm.

 

Photo Credit: Elle UK / Instagram 

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Don’t Miss Ashley Graham’s Curvy Bikini Photo Shoot Candids

Oh Ashley Graham, will you ever stop being sexy. I mean, probably when you’re 90, but not anytime soon, and that’s such a blessing for the rest of us. I don’t want to live in a world where Ashley Graham isn’t sexy.

That would be like living in a world where ice cream tasted like water or a rainbow was just one color. It’s not fun or enjoyable in any way, shape, or form. Thank goodness we don’t have to live in that world and that the world we live in is one that has a sexy Ashley Graham.

I can’t imagine looking at these pics of Ashley Graham and just throwing your hands up and saying, “Seen it!” It’s not a fun way to go through life. A fun way to go through life is to get to the end of the gallery and then start all over again, surprised by how sexy Ashley Graham is even after starting at her for an extended period of time.

We can all look at the glass as half whatever you want, but at least the glass has water in it and at least Ashley Graham is sexy. It’s the only way to keep going in such a miserable world.

[More Bikini Hot Shots From Ashley Graham Right Here]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Caroline Vreeland’s Ridiculously Busty Swimsuit Candids

Take note of the ingenuity that Caroline Vreeland has utilized in order to fit herself into that swimsuit. Do you think she bought that swimsuit off the rack like that? Hell nah, but she liked it and they didn’t have it in her size, so she did what she had to in order to make it work.

In this case she needed to call back a style from the mid-00s. Back then girls would intentionally cut their shirts up each side and then tie them together like they were Indian princesses in buckskin. I always thought it was a silly fashion fad, but apparently it was useful training for the future. Maybe I was wrong about other “useless” fads as well, like taxes and sobriety.

For her sake, I hope Caroline knows what she was doing when she tied those knots up the sides of her suit. Those little strings are under a lot of stress thanks to those knockers. I don’t trust myself to tie my shoes, so I certainly wouldn’t trust myself when public indecency is at stake. I do not know if that is a crime a beautiful woman can be charged with, though.

 

 

Photo Credit: MEGA 

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Celebrity lifestyle posted a photo:

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Celebrity lifestyle posted a photo:

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Celebrity lifestyle posted a photo:

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Celebrity lifestyle posted a photo:

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Celebrity lifestyle posted a photo:

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Celebrity lifestyle posted a photo:

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Claudia Romani In Another Tiny Thong

Another day stuck in a traffic is something I don’t like. I could do without another hike in my cell phone bill. And I would totally be fine if I didn’t ever have to go to the dentist ever again. There are just some things we could all do without, but Claudia Romani in yet another thong is not one of them.

In fact, I wish Claudia Romani could wear a new tiny thong every single day. That would really make it one of the best years of all of our lives. It wouldn’t matter what else happened, we would have a new Claudia Romani to pick us up when we are down. If we are having the best day of our lives then Claudia Romani in a new thong will make that day even brighter. Let’s take this up a notch, let’s have Claudia Romani wear a new thong every 12 hours. I know that’s asking a lot, but if someone could pull off wearing a new thong every 12 hours it would be Claudia Romani.

I’m going to get caught in traffic again, all of our cell phone bills will probably go up again, and we all need to take care of our teeth. But in those moments when we have to do one more thing we don’t want to do, let’s remember that Claudia Romani is probably going to be wearing a new tiny thong.

[More From Claudia Romani Right Over Here]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Jasmine Tosh Sizzling Bikini Body On Display In Miami

I do not like having my phone at the beach. I actually do not like having anything at the beach, myself included, but phones especially. Sand gets into every nook and cranny of the phone and its case, and then there is always the risk of it getting in the water. To put it simply, staying in touch with people wile I am there just is not worth the trouble. That is why I do not understand why Jasmine Tosh is acting so irresponsibly by taking her phone even closer to the water to speak on it. Who could possibly be on the other end that is worth that risk, Melissa Etheridge?

Jasmine must either be fearless or oblivious. She might have a waterproof case for that phone, but it wouldn’t make a difference in my mind. I would still have it in a Ziploc bag if I absolutely had to have it on me. If I could safely keep myself in a plastic bag when at the beach I would do it. Whenever people talk about the bubble boy it is with pity. No one ever talks about the benefits that would come along with it.

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Maria Jade Tans Her Gorgeous Bikini Body In Miami

Often worry about seeing a porn star in real life. I have heard some of them say that men often stare at them without fully recognizing them. They think they know them, but cannot quite place from where. Then they are forced to work through their mental rolodex, trying to find the connection. Some do not figure it out until it is too late.

Those poor saps are usually with their girlfriends or wives. They walk up to the gorgeous lady and ask if they went to school together, or if they worked at the same company. If the porn star has a heart, she will agree. If she doesn’t, she will ruin that poor soul’s day. I don’t blame her for it. If I was a porn star I imagine there would be some fun to it.

I just know that I would be the guy who doesn’t recognize her until after I tell my girlfriend I know her from somewhere. I have tried to train myself into not thinking out loud like that because it has gotten me into trouble before, but I have yet to get it fully under control.

 

Photo Credit: MEGA 

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Nicole Williams Flaunts Her Amazing Body In Bright Bikini Paddleboarding Candids

Nicole Williams is on the top of my wanted list this year. I know it’s too early for Christmas, and I missed my other chance in July, but I still want to make sure I started my list early in an effort to not forget anything. Pretty much all I have written down so far is Nicole and a new weed wacker. Which is honestly all I need. Actually, I can live without the weed wacker if Nicole guarantees to show up to my residence in a big red bow

If I had to put my finger on my favorite part about Nicole, it would be the fact that she’s a risk taker. She’s paddleboarding in the middle of a huge body of water without fear, or a life jacket. I would like to volunteer to be her human life jacket. For safety purposes of course. I’d wrap my arms around her to make sure she doesn’t accidentally go overboard and sink. But if she did, I’d be able to save her. I’d even be up for paddling with my free hand. By the end of the day, I’d make myself so irreplaceable to her that she would have no choice but to take me home. And going home with a good looking lady like her always means great conversation on a comfortable couch. I can’t wait to connect with Williams on her couch.

[Nicole Williams Stuff From TMZ]

Photo Credit: MEGA 

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Chloe Meadows Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Extra Curvy Yellow Bikini

Goodness gracious, great balls of Meadows! Had I known that British reality television was playing host to such talent then I might have actually put forth the little effort required to watch it.

This being the first time that I have been introduced to Chloe’s existence I am both enamored as well as apprehensive. I do not want to get too carried away with my infatuation, imagining marrying her in some Icelandic getaway, only to inevitably be let down by her personality. I am hoping she is one of the protagonists of the show, but given the amount of hair the woman has she is more likely to be an antagonist. Those are the rules, unless the woman has one of those “Can I speak to your manager” type of cuts. If she does then she immediately becomes a James Bond level villain.

But who knows, maybe Britain does not subscribe to the State’s same rules for drama. Maybe the script gets flipped and it is the nerds with glasses that are the mean ones. The nerds constantly make fun of the hot people for being stupid. I think that could work.

 

Photo Credit: MEGA

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UK YouTuber Tanya Burr Hits The Beach Showing Off Her Best Assets In A Sexy Striped Bikini

If you’re not familiar with Tanya Burr, congratulations, as it means that you don’t spend your life on YouTube. The 29-year old British brunette beauty is one of them there YouTubers, and with nearly four million subscribers to her YouTube channel, it’s clear that she’s got something going for her that many other YouTubers don’t.

Tanya took to the beach recently to show us all exactly what she’s got that sets her apart from the crowd, and it turns out, she’s got a smoking hot beach body that looks amazing in a striped bikini! It takes talent to keep a body like that in business, but I suppose you don’t get to three million-plus YouTube subscribers without a modicum of discipline in this arena.

Since Tanya’s YouTube channel consists of her giving out makeup tips, there’s probably no reason for you to subscribe, though I suppose if you’re looking for tips to take your makeup game to the next level, have at it. The rest of us will just wait patiently for more pics like these of Tanya hanging out in a skimpy bikini to surface. I’m a patient man, and even if it takes another year for more pics like this, I think this batch will tide me over quite nicely.

Photo Credit: Splash News

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Italian Model Silvia Caruso Gets Touchy-Feely With Her Girlfriend In Sextastic Beachside Candids

I’d personally like to make my to Italy to thank the entire country for their contributions to this world. Pizza, Pasta, and the giving everyone the ability to enjoy exotic imports like Silvia Caruso. She has a better body than any Lamborghini I’ve seen in magazines. And I’d sure pick her to take out for a spin in the evening over a sports car every time. I’d purposely cut the brake cables when I’m out on the town with a woman who has curves like her. Full speed with my pedal married to the floor, showing her one of the best nights of her life when she’s with me.

I’m glad Silvia is a sharer. She brought another hot babe with her to the beach without anyone asking. I’m a fan of the double trouble. I used to believe the best deal on buy one get one free was on six packs of select beer brands but I like this situation much better. What could be better than warm weather, warm water, and warm smiles from two very welcoming women? It’s a trifecta that’s perfect for having a great time. And if I must have a great time, I prefer to have that great time with Silvia and company.

Photo Credit: MEGA

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Who’s Hotter: Bikini Models Elizabeth Turner and Danielle Herrington Turn Heads Partying Together

Take special note of the swimsuit top that Danielle Herrington is wearing. I was once out in a group and there was a girl wearing a similar top. One of her friends then pulled down said top to expose a pierced nipple.

There is nothing more to that story, I only wanted to let more people know that it happened and that it was awesome. I will carry that memory with me until the day I die. My only regret is that I was so drunk by that point in the night I am not sure if I can trust my own memory. That was perhaps the worst time in my life to reach that level of intoxication.

You might think I could just ask the other people who were present to confirm if it happened or not. But the only other people I know for sure would have seen it would be the girl who pulled down the top and the girl who was wearing the top. And if I am wrong, and I only dreamt up the whole incident, then I am in for a very awkward conversation with them. Besides, I am happier believing it to be true.

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA

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Ashley Graham’s Bodacious Bikini Body Is All Curves In All The Right Places

All you haters better back off and all you sinners better get in my truck! Ashley Graham is one of the hottest women on the planet and any chance we get to see her rocking a bikini and showing off her ample curves is one worth taking.

This full-figured brunette beauty has been the subject of controversy here in the States where some men feel that women have to meet a certain standard in order to be considered sexy. There’s a word for men like this: Morons. There’s no universally accepted definition of beautiful, and as the saying goes, it rests mostly in the eye of the beholder. So if you behold her and don’t like her, move on. There’s plenty of other women that more readily fit whatever narrow definition of the word beautiful makes your miserable ass comfortable.

The rest of us will be over here admiring Ashley’s many virtues and enjoying the hell out of ourselves in the bargain. I’d love for everyone to be able to see the beauty I see when I look at Ashley, but I’m too much of a realist to expect any of you to change. If you have something negative to say about Ashley, go peddle that shit elsewhere. We don’t want you here.

[Get Your Fill Of Ashley Graham Bikini Pics Right Here]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA / Splash News

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Weekend Bikini Roundup: Natasha Oakley, Elizabeth Turner And Much, Much More Curvy Goodness

There’s no better time than summer to spend some time walking on the beaches looking at the peaches! This past weekend was a scorcher and the best thing about that kind of weather is catching up with all the hot babes who hit the beach in their barely-there bikinis!

If you’re like me and you’re not up on all the latest hotties, allow me to introduce you to some of the hottest women you’ve ever seen. First of all, don’t be scared off by the literary allusions Alysia Kaempf’s last name conjurs, though I do wonder what her significant other calls her behind closed doors. Then there’s the gorgeous Caroline Vreeland, who really knows a thing or two about a thing or two.

Let’s see who else we’ve got here… Ah yes, Natasha Oakley, who’s hotter than the sunglasses with whom she shares a name. Elizabeth Turner, Devin Brugman, Natalie Roser, and Veronica Maya are no slouches either. I think we’d be happy to spend the day at the beach with any of these sun worshipping goddesses.

As a matter of fact, I think The Stranglers said it better than I ever could, so please enjoy this classic tune as you take a stroll through the gallery below…

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA / MEGA 

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Nina Agdal Wet And Wild In Animal Print Bikini

Is that Nina splashing around in that water, or an actual leopard? The print of that swimsuit is so realistic that it is hard to tell the difference. I was not even aware that it was okay to get leopard fur wet. Hopefully there are no poachers in the immediate area. One of them is liable to take a potshot in hopes of making an easy payday.

How anyone could take a majestic creature like Nina Agdal out of the wild just to have her stuffed and mounted on some wall is just sickening to me. A beauty such as hers is meant to be appreciated by all, and not to be stowed away in private for a select few to view. Those poachers should take after the photographers and only shoot their prey with cameras.

A fine specimen such as Nina should not be taken out of this world until she has reached her peak, which I refuse to believe has occurred. After the peak has been reached, in say one or two years, sure, do with her what you will. By that point some other Scandinavian is bound to have taken her place.

[See Nina Agdal’s Sports Illustrated Shots Right Here]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA

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Bombshell Blonde Brennah Black’s Must-See Asstastic Photo Shoot

Brennah Black is less of a bombshell and more of a nuclear warhead when it comes to being explosively attractive. I’d willingly give her my coordinates if she’s willing to drop in and blow my world away. I wouldn’t even need to use war as an excuse to encourage her to assault me with her attractive features. Love is a battlefield and her looks certainly kill. I’m waving a white flag right now. Thank goodness they didn’t weaponize this woman during the Battle of Normandy because who wouldn’t surrender to a bunch of blondes on the beach that look like Brennah. Thankfully she’s only interested in drinking water by some water, which is alright with me.

Actually, it would be even better if we could drink water together at the beach. I’d be in charge of grabbing some plastic cups and making sure no sand gets in either one of our drinks. Her beauty is a blessing and her body is a miracle, so maybe she could perform them and turn the purified water to wine. Even if she couldn’t I’d still be in awe while in her presence. I’ve been a devoted disciple ever since I laid eyes on her and I’m willing to follow her anywhere she goes.

Photo Credit: Splash News / Backgrid USA

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Bella Hadid Looking Red Hot In Her Skimpiest Bikini Selfie Yet

It’s hard to surprise people when you traffic in shocking and unpredictable behavior, but Bella Hadid has figured out a way to keep us on our toes. Just when I thought we’d probably seen Bella at her sexiest, she goes ahead and posts what might be her sexiest picture ever.

I don’t know if she’s oiled or lotioned up, or if she just finished a sweaty workout, but she’s glistening in a way that makes her look her absolute sexiest. It’s kind of an incredible thing to see a beautiful woman looking even more amazing than normal, and it’s absolutely cause for celebration.

And I haven’t even mentioned the bikini yet, which looks to be here skimpiest ever. Seriously, that thing barely qualifies as a bikini as it’s barely keeping her best bits concealed. She’s fighting a losing battle, and to be honest, I’m loving every single second of it.

So never underestimate the ability of a truly beautiful woman to surprise you. Keeping us on guard and ever vigilant that the sexiest is yet to come is Bella Hadid’s stock in trade. And don’t you forget it!

[Read More About Bella Hadid And Her Many Stalkers HERE]

Photo Credit: Instagram / MEGA 

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