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Hollywood Producer Scott Rudin is Allegedly an Even Bigger Asshole Than Joss Whedon

Hollywood sexual misconduct has been very much in the news since Ronan Farrow’s expose on Harvey Weinstein started the #metoo movement, but there’s also a lot of misconduct of the non-sexual kind going on in Tinseltown. The Hollywood Reporter chronicled a number of allegations against Scott Rudin that aren’t sexual but make him seem like a caricature of an angry boss, like  Bob Odenkirk’s ‘Artillery’ Arthur Hobbs on How I Met Your Mother.

At about 4:15 p.m. — more than 10 hours into a typical Rudin day that began at 6 and never wrapped before 8 — the Oscar-winning producer was enraged that one of his assistants failed to get him a seat on a sold-out flight. In a fit of fury, he allegedly smashed an Apple computer monitor on the assistant’s hand. The screen shattered, leaving the young man bleeding and in need of immediate medical attention. One person in the office at the time described the incident as sounding like a car crash: a cacophonous collision of metal, glass and limb. The wounded assistant headed to the emergency room, and Rudin called his lawyer, according to another staffer there that Halloween afternoon.

He hit a guy with a computer monitor. That would seem far-fetched in River City Ransom.

“He threw a laptop at the window in the conference room and then went into the kitchen and we could hear him beating on the napkin dispenser,” says [Caroline] Rugo. “Then another time he threw a glass bowl at [a colleague]. It’s hard to say if he threw it in the general direction or specifically at [the colleague], but the glass bowl hit the wall and smashed everywhere. The HR person left in an ambulance due to a panic attack. That was the environment.”

That sounds like the behavior of an abusive spouse or a toddler or both.

“I went into the kitchen, and I was like, ‘Hey, Scott, A24 is on the way up. I’m not sure what it’s concerning,’ ” he says. “And he flipped out, like, ‘Nobody told me A24 was on my schedule.’ He threw it at me, and I dodged a big potato. He was like, ‘Well, find out, and get me a new potato.’ “

He threw a potato at an assistant. That’s almost incredible like he’s just throwing whatever he can reach.

“He asked me to clean the kitchen. I told him, ‘That’s really not my job.’ I had to do a bunch of other stuff that was urgent,” the former assistant says. “The kitchen was not urgent. And then he flipped out, and he took his teacup, threw it, and it shattered and left a hole in the wall. I was like, ‘I’m a human. This is a physical act of aggression.’ “

That’s a lot worse.

How has Hollywood treated this alleged behavior, which, much like Harvey Weinstein’s abuses of power, everyone in town has supposedly know about for decades? They gave him an EGOT and over 100 Oscar nominations.

“When they ultimately quit — which they always do at some point — he vindictively goes on IMDb and takes away any credits they may have amassed while working for him,” says one producer who hired a traumatized assistant following a Rudin stint and saw the practice play out.

People don’t just abuse their power to get sex; power is naturally corrupting. Once everyone starts telling you that you can do no wrong, well, you start to believe them.

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Kate Winslet Knows 4 Actors Hollywood Has Scared to Come Out

Kristen Stewart was basically a pariah a few years ago. She was the gloomy actress who slept with a married director (and cheated on Robert Pattinson) and a lot of  Ovid fans wanted nothing to do with her. One short haircut and an interview where she confirms she likes vaginas as much as the rest of us later, she’s basically Hollywood’s new it girl.

This is very much not a typical Hollywood coming-out story, even today. Contrary to what you might imagine, being LGBT is not a ticket to success in Hollywood and homophobia is still an issue in Tinseltown.

Despite Hollywood’s gay-friendly image to the public, Kate Winslet says that being gay can severely limit your career prospects as an actor.

Page Six reports Winslet says she knows at least four people who are in the closet and afraid that coming out would cost them acting roles. In 2021.

“I can think of at least four actors absolutely hiding their sexuality,” the actress, 45, told the Sunday Times. “It’s painful. Because they fear being found out. And that’s what they say. ‘I don’t want to be found out.’”

Winslet explained that the discrimination often begins as soon as actors and actresses launch their careers.

“I cannot tell you the number of young actors I know — some well-known, some starting out — who are terrified their sexuality will be revealed and that it will stand in the way of their being cast in straight roles,” she said, calling the notion “f–ked up.”

Gay actors Neil Patrick Harris and Jim Parsons both had a lot of success playing straight characters, but neither came out until after the shows they were on started airing. And still Hollywood is nervous that gay actors can’t “play straight,” even though 20-30-somethings routinely play teenagers.

“It’s bad news. Hollywood has to drop that dated crap of, ‘Can he play straight because, apparently, he’s gay?’” she told the newspaper, noting that the stigma applies to “men more than anything.”

“That should be almost illegal. You would not believe how widespread it is. And it can’t just be distilled to the question about gay actors playing gay parts. Because actors, in some cases, are choosing not to come out for personal reasons. And it’s nobody’s business. Perhaps privacy. Perhaps conditioning and shame.”

Here’s a fun game: name a living, male openly bisexual actor. Did you say Alan Cumming? If you said anyone I’ll bet you said Alan Cumming.

We like to think of Hollywood and brands and big cities as being liberal utopias where the LGBT community is welcomed with open arms because of a deep sense of moral righteousness. It’s actually all a calculated business decision.

There’s an episode of 30 Rock where Jack tells Liz “We’ll trick those race-car-loving wide loads into watching your lefty, homoerotic propaganda hour yet.” That is the purest distillation of how Hollywood and big business writ large think about these issues. It’s all a calculation about how to make the most money.

The post Kate Winslet Knows 4 Actors Hollywood Has Scared to Come Out appeared first on The Blemish.

There Have Been Some Massive Marvel Spoilers Lately

Marvel has been riding high lately because of the success of their original programming on Disney+, but The Falcon and the Winter Soldier has failed to generate nearly as much buzz as WandaVision. To be fair, not much is going to generate that kind of buzz, WandaVision was the perfect show at the perfect time and everyone was invested in the secrets the show had on offer. The Falcon and the Winter Soldier is perfectly fine, but it doesn’t have the same hooks to keep people talking from week to week.

What does have people talking, however, is a few major reported leaks from Marvel; and if you read on, you may get a big load of spoilers Eternals in particular.

In fact, the entire plot of the movie has leaked with “undeniable evidence” of its veracity, if you believe the moderators of Reddit’s r/MarvelStudiosSpoilers.

There are a lot of details, but the main thrust of the plot is summarized in one paragraph.

Sersi learns that the Celestials created both races and that the Eternals are basically just very advanced robots. They seed young planets with a Celestial “egg” that takes eons to mature. The evolving intelligent life on these planets feeds the Celestial’s growth, so the Eternals are sent to protect the evolving life forms and kill the Deviants. After the emergence, the Eternals are ” rebooted” and sent to another world (this is the cause of Thena’s memory issue, as she knows that the planet is doomed) – this cycle has gone on for millions of years. Earth was seeded and Tiamut is about to emerge (this was the cause of the earthquake earlier). Once awakened, the entire planet and all life will be destroyed.

That is one of the most comic book things I’ve ever heard in my life.

It doesn’t look like this film is setting up the Eternals to be a major presence going forward like the Avengers or the Guardians of the Galaxy. The synopsis makes it sound more like a one-off with Ikaris (Richard Madden) possibly not surviving to the end of the film.

What does seem certain is that it’s setting up Kit Harrington to be a major player in the MCU. Which is funny because he’s playing Dane Whitman, the Black Knight, one of the lamest Avengers ever. And keep in mind that The Avengers comic featured Hawkeye in little purple booties.

The two end credit stingers: 1) Dane is looking at an old box and pulls out a sword that is wrapped up. Just as he is about to touch it, an off screen voice stops him. 2) On the Eternals’ ship, Pip the Troll appears and introduces Starfox.

To be fair, Iron Man was like Marvel’s 58th most popular character, just in front of that X-Men character who has giant slugs for a stomach until he was played by Robert Downey, Jr. Kit Harrington could absolutely make Black Knight a major player in the MCU.

Where will they use him? Another leak claims Marvel is developing a number of Avengers spin-offs, including Young Avengers, Dark Avengers and West Coast Avengers, the latter being the place Dane Whitman seems the most likely to show up.

Marvel has been slowly putting the pieces in place for Young Avengers, with Billy and Tommy Maximoff showing up in WandaVision (and the ending’s cryptic hint that they’re still alive somewhere), Ant-Man’s Cassie Lang being all grown up now and Hawkeye set to introduce Kate Bishop, the actually cool Hawkeye. The Falcon and the Winter Soldier also introduced a piece of Young Avengers lore when Bucky took Sam to meet Isaiah Bradley, a test subject for the Super Soldier Serum Steve Rogers was given and grandfather to Eli Bradley, the Young Avengers’ Captain America analogue Patriot. Be on the lookout for Teddy Altman, aka Hulkling, to show up in Secret Invasion.

Dark Avengers is also something fans have been speculating on for a while. I’ve never been a fan of this theory, but this leak says it’s in development. William Hurt’s Thunderbolt Ross, who becomes the Red Hulk in the comics, is about the only character I can think of who might be a member. Possibly U.S. Agent, currently appearing in The Falcon and the Winter Soldier, and the white Vision and new Black Widow, I guess?

Finally, what is The West Coast Avengers, the team almost certain to include Jon Snow? Well, if The Avengers was Marvel’s way of showcasing all the characters who weren’t popular enough to carry their own title (and it was for about 40 years), West Coast Avengers is the book for characters not popular enough to be in The Avengers. Lead by Hawkeye, the team featured such notable characters as Wonder Man, Tigra, U. S. Agent and Machine Man. Nextwave had a more recognizable line-up.

Make a Nextwave movie instead, you cowards!

The post There Have Been Some Massive Marvel Spoilers Lately appeared first on The Blemish.

Zack Snyder’s Fans Are Officially Back on Their Bullshit

Zack Snyder’s cut of Justice League has been available on HBO Max for just over a week, which is almost enough time to watch it from beginning to end. But his fans are already back online complaining about Warner not understanding the brilliance of Zack Snyder.

Warner has indicated that even though they did cough up quite a chunk of change to get the Snyder cut finished they have no plans to films Snyder’s planned sequels that would detail Superman’s fall to evil and eventual redemption.

One can’t really blame Warner for wanting to move on to other things; despite the success of The Snyder Cut, it still didn’t do as well on HBO Max as Wonder Woman 84, a film that was by all accounts terrible, and they made over a billion dollars on Joker, a movie nobody wanted completely disconnected from any type of continuity.

The MCU works for Marvel, but the DCEU hasn’t really worked for DC. The biggest success they had was probably Shazam!, which was technically part of the DCEU but a big departure in tone and with basically no connection other than talking about the existence of other DC characters.

Back before Marvel was the cinematic powerhouse it is today, both Marvel and DC primarily stepped outside of comic books through direct-to-video animated features. DC was leagues ahead of Marvel with the quality of their features. The strategy they used looks a lot like the one that Warner is interested in pursuing cinematically now; a mix of original stories and adaptations of their biggest comic books, with some movies forming universes with each other and some being entirely stand-alone.

Zack Snyder’s fans have taken this all in stride and are eyeing totally reasonable with their disappointment. Just kidding, they’re review-bombing Godzilla vs Kong with one-star reviews.

As I’ve said before, I don’t find Snyder’s fans to be toxic or bad people like some have claimed, they’re just really annoying.

I mean, I get the disappointment, we live in a world of broken hopes and dreams of entertainment that was not to be, like a good Star Wars movie made after 1983 or a Jenji Kohan series that maintains a consistent level of quality instead of getting sucked inside its own asshole and losing all the charm it once had about halfway through the third season.

Whether you’re a fan of Snyder’s work or not, it’s clear after seeing his version of Justice League that he has a grand vision that a lot of people would enjoy. It’s also clear that his vision is more than a little indulgent and would cost huge amounts of money to bring to life with potentially mixed returns. In an increasingly competitive movie market with an increasingly uncertain future, even an industry giant like Warner Brothers doesn’t want to take that kind of risk, especially when they can potentially make more money on smaller projects like Joker or The Suicide Squad.

I know it’s disappointing, but being able to say you did a better job than Joss Whedon on Justice League just doesn’t mean that much to studios these days.

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‘Boy Meets World’ Star Danielle Fishel’s Husband Found Shrimp in His Cereal

Like most adults in the GenX/Millennial cusper age group, I have an unreasonable love for children’s breakfast cereals. Cinnamon Toast Crunch is normally pretty high on my list; it’s not Cocoa Pebbles but it’ll do in a pinch.

Danielle Fishel, the Boy Meets World romantic lead who didn’t start doing porn, and her husband Jensen Karp are also both apparently fans of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, though maybe not anymore.

Karp appears to have found Cinnamon Toast Shrimp bits in his breakfast.

That looks a lot like shrimp tails covered in whatever chemical concoction of deliciousness they put on Cinnamon Toast Crunch to me.

Karp is having the shrimp’s DNA tested, so we’ll soon know not only if it’s shrimp but where it’s from. It’s basically like 23andMe for shrimp. Those shrimp are definitely looking to tell people they’re part manatee.

For his part, Karp has been entirely reasonable and frankly hilarious about this.

This story has even more bizarre moments like General Mills asked him to take the cereal to the police.

Now, as funny as this is, and it’s really, really funny, this sort of cross-contamination could cause some serious issues. For starters, Cinnamon Toast Crunch is both Kosher and Halal, while shrimp is neither of those things. I’m not a religious person but someone who is religious would rightfully be furious about this.

Even more seriously, though, is that shellfish allergies aren’t uncommon as allergies go. If the wrong person had gotten this, they could have had a serious allergic reaction.

Luckily, someone with a shellfish allergy didn’t get that box.

That wild set of coincidences is who got this box.

Mythical Chef Josh, the guy who makes all the weird food that Rhett and Link eat on Good Mythical Morning, made Cinnamon Toast Crunch crusted shrimp. Because of course he did.

I am on the edge of my seat waiting to hear the results of the very important shrimp DNA tests, honestly.

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‘Jeopardy!’ Fans Hate Dr. Oz As Much As Everyone Else Hates Dr. Oz

“That ain’t it, chief.”

That was the reaction of basically every Jeopardy! fan as they tuned in and saw Dr. Mehmet Oz stepping into the shoes of the irreplaceable Alex Trebek.

You would think Oz would be a slam-dunk, he’s a popular and charismatic host and clearly very intelligent: he has an MD from Penn and he pioneered a new mitral valve procedure in the 90s.

of course, if you’ve ever watched The Dr. Oz Show, probably because you were visiting your grandmother, you know that these days he’s more known for, well… spewing a bunch of unscientific bullshit. You don’t become Oprah’s favorite doctor without telling her homeopathy is great, after all.

Jeopardy! is a fairly difficult quiz show for the average person, so it attracts an audience of people who like to challenge their minds. That’s not really Dr. Oz’s brand, and the fans were quick to let the talk show know it on social media.

Judging from that profile picture, he was a contestant.

Now, I personally would not call Dr. Oz a snake oil salesman or a charlatan, mainly because that’s the sort of wording that can open one up to a defamation lawsuit. Now if you call someone a dipshit, well, that’s not a statement of fact and no one can get sued.

So far Jeopardy! producer Mike Richards has been the most impressive guest host, sort of like the time NBC hired a writer from The Simpsons with basically no experience on-camera to replace David Letterman. Just came out of nowhere and changed the game.

Personally, I think Richards would be a good choice, as would LeVar Burton or Mayim Bialik, with the latter already scheduled for a guest hosting slot down the line.

On second thought, maybe just call LeVar Burton already and wrap this thing up.

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Kylie Jenner Wants You To Help Pay Her Friend’s Medical Bills

America is the only developed country in the world that doesn’t have universal health care. The primary reason for this is that 40 years ago we elected Ronald Reagan president and he gave the money we would have used to pay for that sort of program to rich people in the form of tax breaks.

Now when people need basically any sort of medical procedure, the best way to pay for it is to panhandle on the internet and hope a celebrity retweets your gofundme or whatever. But when that celebrity is your friend, it’s a bit of a tricky situation.

Kylie Jenner’s former make-up artist was in a car accident, so Kylie retweeted his fundraiser and donated $5,000. Keep in mind she’s a billionaire. With a B.

If it seems kind of messed up for a billionaire to ask her fans to chip in for medical bills for a friend when she could easily pay them all herself with the same hit to her net worth that you or I would take buying a pack of gum, well, it is.

TMZ questioned why people thought Kylie should be the one to do this.

For starters, anyone who follows Kylie and saw this wasn’t forced/obligated to do anything. Second … the logic that rich people/celebs are heartless heathens for trying to raise money when they could just as easily fund the whole damn thing is absurd. Hardly any celeb does that — even the richest among them — and it’s unreasonable to expect them to anyway.

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Deshaun Watson Has More Sexual Assault Lawsuits than Post-Season Starts

Things aren’t looking great for Deshaun Watson. For starters, he plays for the Texans and that’s just not where you want to be if you’re looking to win a Super Bowl. He’s also facing nine lawsuits for sexual misconduct.

If the allegations are to be believed, Watson is the second-worst thing to happen to the massage industry in recent memory.

According to ESPN, Watson is accused by one massage therapist of touching her with his penis and by another of forcing her to perform oral sex on him, which she “did not consent” to.

The plaintiff alleges that she felt “intimidated and threatened” and “she was afraid of what someone like Watson could do if she did not submit to his demands.” She says in the lawsuit that Watson made it clear, repeatedly, that he could “help, or hurt, her career.”

The lawyer who filed lawsuits on behalf of those women say he’s going to file a total of nine lawsuits against Watson.

The NFL is investigating these claims independently and the Texans say they’re waiting for the results of that investigation.

“The NFL informed us [Thursday] that they will conduct an investigation into the allegations made in the civil lawsuits filed against Deshaun Watson,” the team said. “We will stay in close contact with the league as they do. We continue to take this and all matters involving anyone within the Houston Texans organization seriously. We do not anticipate making any additional statements until the NFL’s investigation concludes.”

Watson says that the allegations are false, stating “I have never treated any woman with anything other than the utmost respect.”

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The 2021 Oscars Nominees Honor More Movies You Haven’t Seen Than Ever

Normally the Oscars are packed full of nominations for films no one saw because they’re all Holocaust or AIDS dramas that released the last week of December to six theaters in West Covina and spent three times the films’ budgets on “For Your Consideration” campaigns.

This year, however, movie theaters were closed all year because if you designed the ideal place to spread COVID-19 to large groups of people as efficiently as possible from the ground up, you’d probably just get a movie theater. The Oscars had to do something they have been loathe to do before now and allow films that debuted on streaming services to be eligible for awards. This includes Netflix’s prestige film Mank, a black and white period piece about the making of Citizen Kane. You can hear the Academy voters having an orgasm just reading that sentence.

The late Chadwick Boseman was nominated for his role in Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom, and he’s almost certain to win. This probably wasn’t the best performance of the year, and it probably wasn’t Chadwick Boseman’s best performance, but clearly voters are going to want to show how much he’s missed, and I don’t blame them.

But I also feel that you could accomplish everything worthwhile that this year’s Oscars will accomplish by just having a tribute show for Chadwick Boseman.

Here’s a list of all the major-category nominations (the full list of nominations is here). Take out a piece of paper and make a mark on it every time you see the name of a movie you’ve actually seen. Then when you’re done, do whatever you want with your blank piece of paper.

Best Picture

The Father
Judas and the Black Messiah
Promising Young Woman
Sound of Metal
The Trial of the Chicago 7

Best Director

Thomas Vinterberg, Another Round
David Fincher, Mank
Lee Isaac Chung, Minari
Chloe Zhao, Nomadland
Emerald Fennell, Promising Young Woman

Best Actor in a Leading Role

Riz Ahmed, Sound of Metal
Chadwick Boseman, Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom
Anthony Hopkins, The Father
Gary Oldman, Mank
Steven Yeun, Minari

Best Actress in a Leading Role

Viola Davis, Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom
Andra Day, United States vs. Billie Holiday
Vanessa Kirby, Pieces of a Woman
Frances McDormand, Nomadland
Carey Mulligan, Promising Young Woman

Best Actor in a Supporting Role

Sacha Baron Cohen, The Trial of the Chicago 7
Daniel Kaluuya, Judas and the Black Messiah
Leslie Odom, Jr., One Night in Miami
Paul Raci, Sound of Metal
LaKeith Stanfield, Judas and the Black Messiah

Best Actress in a Supporting Role

Maria Bakalova, Borat Subsequent Moviefilm
Glenn Close, Hillbilly Elegy
Olivia Colman, The Father
Amanda Seyfried, Mank
Yuh-Jung Youn, Minari

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Woman Banned From Uber and Lyft for not Wearing a Mask Tells Her Story on TikTok While Not Wearing a Shirt

This woman really hates non-optional pieces of clothing.

We have certain rules as a society, and one of the main ones is you have to wear clothes. People have been getting their panties in a bunch over this for a long time, but they wear those panties because we can’t just have people showing all their bits and bobs in public.

People refusing to wear masks because freedom are just the latest in a long line of people with “barefoot is legal” shirts and “No shoes, no shirt, no problem!” signs hanging in the bar in their basement.

But they’re really going overboard with it.

Take, for example, the woman who lost her s**t when an Uber driver told her she had to wear a mask.

We’re in the middle of a pandemic, you shouldn’t be taking Ubers or cabs at all, honestly, but if you need to risk your life and the life of the driver, at least be nice to the person you’re putting in danger.

The woman in the video was banned from both Uber and Lyft.

I’m sure she took it graciously and vowed to be a better person, right?

No, what she actually did was make a video bitching about how she was right with no shirt on.

What did clothes ever do to this girl that she hates them so much? Did clothes murder her parents, so she runs around without clothes to strike fear into the hear of clothes like Batman?

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‘WandaVision’: Why Your Fan Theories Were Both Wrong and Right and Where Does Marvel Go Now?

Even though it had what I would call a satisfying ending, it’s sad to see WandaVision go. We’re not going to see a season 2 of the show, though Wanda’s story will continue in Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness. Even though I’m sure that Falcon and the Winter Soldier and Loki will be good shows, WandaVision became a cultural phenomenon in a way the other Marvel shows are unlikely to reproduce.

And before we get started, there are going to be spoilers for probably every episode of WandaVision, so watch it and then come back.

One thing we can say for sure about WandaVision is that it made Wanda Maximoff, now going by her comic book moniker the Scarlet Witch, a major character in the Marvel Universe. I would bet that right now, more people want to see the next Doctor Strange movie to follow the story of this supporting character from the background of the Avengers films than to see the exploits of Doctor Strange himself.

That’s exactly what Disney was hoping to accomplish with their TV shows in a way they never could with projects like Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.; they wanted the TV shows to build hype for the movies, and they certainly have.

Of course, a big part of the appeal of WandaVision was the Twin Peaks-esque story that left fans guessing about what was coming. It may seem like there was a major lack of payoff with things like the aerospace engineer we were all sure would turn out to be a major cameo, and it was supposed to be, but some things got cut that still had a bunch of clues pointing to them in earlier episodes. These cameos were presumably cut so late in production that Elizabeth Olsen and Teyonah Parris weren’t even aware they were cut, though Paul Bettany was talking about himself when he said he got to work with an actor he had always admired.

Of course, there were plenty of red herrings as well. Like, what was the point of casting Evan Peters as a fake Pietro if he just turned out to be some guy who Agatha was controlling to get close to Wanda and learn her secrets? It was meant to make us think that he might be the Quicksilver from the X-Men films because if they had cast anyone else, we, the audience, wouldn’t have been fooled. It’s the same reason Emma Caulfield was cast as Dottie, who turned out to just be another one of Wanda’s neighbors trapped in the hex. If Kathryn Hahn was the only person you recognized outside of the main cast, it would have been even easier to figure out that she was going to play a bigger role in the series.

Even though WandaVision wrapped its plot up and answered most of our questions, the serialized nature of the Marvel universe means there are still some plot threads dangling at the end of the show. Vision has been reassembled and the Vision Wanda created gave him his memories back, but without the Mind Gem as a part of his brain, what will his personality be like?

And what about Billy and Tommy? Were they ever even real? Wanda hearing their voices in the post-credits scene seems to imply that they are real and they’re alive somewhere. Considering Marvel seems to be looking to introduce the Young Avengers, with Cassie Lang having been recast for a potentially bigger role in Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantamania and Kate Bishop slated to appear in the upcoming Hawkeye series, I don’t think we’ve seen the last of them. This is especially likely considering Billy is Marvel’s most prominent LGBT character, along with his husband Hulkling, who I wouldn’t be surprised to see turn up in Secret Invasion.

And if you’re looking for the next Marvel show that could hit the zeitgeist the same way WandaVision and The Mandalorian have, Secret Invasion is a safe guess, as is She-Hulk, which is going to surprise a lot of people if it’s anything close to the quality of the John Byrne or Dan Slott eras of the comic it’s based on.

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Taylor Swift calls Netflix Show Sexist for Making a Joke at Her Expense

Taylor Swift sort of famously has no sense of humor. People don’t really talk about it, but have you ever heard a story about her laughing something off or taking something in stride? I haven’t, but I have heard a bunch of stories about her getting in various squabbles and being mad about relatively innocuous.

Ginny & Georgia, a mother/daughter dramedy on Netflix that’s been compared to Gilmore Girls, had a relatively harmless joke about Swift, with one character saying to another “You go through men faster than Taylor Swift.”

Of course, Taylor Swift lost her damn mind when she found about it, and her fans were more than happy to point out that the most important part of feminism is liking Taylor Swift.

Hey Ginny & Georgia, 2010 called and it wants its lazy, deeply sexist joke back. How about we stop degrading hard working women by defining this horse s**t as FuNnY. Also, @netflix after Miss Americana this outfit doesn’t look cute on you. Happy Women’s History Month I guess

She could have just said nothing. That was an option she had. She could have just heard that joke (which I agree isn’t that funny) and let it go.

There were a lot of people claiming that Swift was being slut-shamed, but no one is calling Taylor Swift a slut, she obviously isn’t. Taylor Swift is a serial monogamist and that’s what people are making fun of her for.

Swift jumped from high-profile relationship to high-profile relationship and wrote a lot of songs about how much the guys she dated sucked. It’s not a great joke because it’s been told a hundred times, but it’s not wrong, either.

In her own way, Taylor Swift is just as egotistical as Kanye West. Sure, Kanye just rambles on about how he’s the most powerful human being or whatever, but Swift sells herself as some sort of living embodiment of feminism, and if you don’t like her then you’re betraying womankind. That takes a pretty swelled head, too.

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‘Spider-Man 3’ Has a Name and Only Spider-Man… Or Does It?

There have been a lot of rumors about Spider-Man 3 involving titles and plot and which actors will be in it, and we’ve finally gotten some solid answers about what is actually going on.

It started when Tom Holland posted the title to his Instagram, confirming that the film would be called Spider-Man: Phone Home.

Wait, what? That title sucks. Are they seriously going to call it that?

Of course not. The actual name, as revealed by Kevin Feige, is Spider-Man: No Way Home. That certainly sounds pretty multiversal to me.

Marvel has been trying to deny the multiverse aspect of the film, though. We know that Jamie Foxx and Alfred Molina are in this film, playing Electro and Doctor Octopus, the same characters they played in the Andrew Garfield and Toby Maguire films. And there have been rumors that Garfield and Maguire will be showing up in this film as, well, alternate versions of Spider-Man. Sony has wanted to cross their different Spider-Man movie series forever before Marvel Studios stepped in to make them.

Tom Holland has been insisting, however, that he’s the only Spider-Man we’ll be seeing. Via Entertainment Weekly:

“It would be amazing if they were because they [meaning Marvel] haven’t told me that yet, and I am Spider-Man and I’ve read the script from the beginning to the end,” Holland told Fallon. “So, it would be a miracle if they could’ve kept that from me, but at the moment there is no cameo from the two boys.”

I don’t think every Spider-Man film needs to involve the multiverse, but Marvel seems to be leaning into it as a concept for Phase Four. The next Dr. Strange film even has it right in the title and Spider-Man: No Way Home is to form a loose trilogy with that film and WandaVision.
Of course, you can explore the multiverse without putting those particular actors in your film, but if Spider-Man does go multiversal, I expect at least a cameo for the other theatrical Spider-Men.

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‘WandaVision’: Was it Really REDACTED All Along?

This week’s WandaVision was the biggest yet, as we finally started to get some answers with the show moving into its final act.

Even though WandaVision has been refreshingly different from basically every other Marvel Studios project, it still has a classical story structure, and this week we hit what Blake Snyder called the All Is Lost moment in his Save the Cat beat sheet and what Dan Harmon’s story circle labels “They pay a heavy price for it.” Either way you look at it, it means we’re moving into the final act.

Basically, everyone was right and Agnes is really Agatha Harkness, Wanda’s mentor in the original comics, and everything going on in Westview has been her doing. We even got a Munsters-inspired opening credit sequence explaining it was Agatha All Along, one of the highlights of the entire series, which showed her manipulating events with her purple magical energy.

Something I noticed that I think a lot of people missed is that the energy field around the Hex was a bluish-purple in episode 4 and 5 until Wanda came into the real world for her showdown with Hayward; Wanda reinforced the magic to make the barrier harder to pass through, and that’s when it turned red.

Passing through this magical barrier a third time in her attempt to save Wanda (who she thought was behind the Hex) gave Monica Rambeau her superpowers. She even did the superhero landing Deadpool joked about in his first film that’s become visual shorthand for someone having superpowers.

Now that we know the Westview anomaly was Agatha All Along, that raises the question of what Agatha actually wants. She clearly wanted Wanda and Vision to have children; she pushed them into a romantic evening in the first episode and was behind the town’s creepy, synchronized “For the children” chant in the second.

Tommy and Billy also only aged around Agatha; first while she was watching them as babies, then when she brought the doghouse for Sparky and then Wanda had to talk them out of aging themselves up again when Sparky died, which was also Agatha’s doing. Maybe she was trying to get the twins alone to try to age them up again and we’ll see them as teens in the final two episodes.

After the birth of the twins, Agatha focused on creating strife in Wanda and Vision’s marriage, starting right after they were born, hinting that something is wrong through Herb. She even sent Pietro and pointed Vision to the edge of the anomaly by sitting there in her car pretending to be frozen like the rest of the people at the edge of town. She really gave up the plot at that point, as she still responded to Agnes when Vision “freed” her from mind control even though everyone in Westview has a TV name, not their own.

That book in Agatha’s basement with the red glowing energy (that matches Wanda’s) isn’t a coincidence, either. One theory is that she needs Wanda to use her powers so she can siphon them off into the book or use them to open the book for whatever reason, possibly to summon the show’s real villain. That would explain why the “Previously on WandaVision” from the recap had been re-recorded for every episode to sound slightly more lethargic which each episode.

Despite her theme music describing her as “insidious” and “perfidious,” maybe Agatha Harkness isn’t actually evil. Pietro, who we know is under Agatha’s control, pointed out in episode 6 that Wanda’s powers had really grown from what they appeared to be in Age of Ultron. And Billy has inherited Wanda’s hex powers now that he’s grown up. Maybe Agatha is using Wanda’s powers to keep that ominous book closed so whatever is inside stays inside. And maybe she’s trying to increase Wanda’s magical abilities (as well as create another magic user in Billy) in order to fight some as-of-yet unnamed evil being.

That’s something of a longshot, but WandaVision has been so full of twists that this could be another misdirect. But Agatha Harkness was never evil in the comics per se, and she was Wanda’s mentor in the mystical arts.

There’s also the matter of Monica’s “aerospace engineer” friend and that promised “big guest star” that didn’t get leaked. Teyonah Parris told comicbook.com “I can’t wait to see what y’all’s reaction is when you learn with the aerospace engineer is.” The person we met in episode 7 who delivered the rover Monica attempted to breach the anomaly with was not an existing Marvel character and was played by a relatively unknown actress. One of two things is going on here: either that wasn’t the engineer Monica was talking about who delivered the rover or she’s a Skrull, tying the show into both Captain Marvel and the upcoming Secret Invasion series. Billy’s husband in the comics, Hulkling, is the son of the Kree hero Captain Marvel and a daughter of the Skrull emperor, so he could be introduced in Captain Marvel 2 or Secret Invasion. We’ve already seen at least one of their Young Avengers teammates, Ant-Man’s daughter Cassie Lang, and Hawkeye is set to introduce Kate Bishop, the new, better Hawkeye to the MCU.

If Major Goodner is revealed to be a Skrull, that means the promised guest star could be anyone, though Doctor Strange would be the safest bet at that point. Whatever Agatha is up to, Wanda’s powers have grown incredibly fast and she’s going to need someone to help her learn how to harness them.

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Logan Paul is Moving to Puerto Rico to Avoid Paying Taxes

Puerto Rico is not a state, but it is part of the United States. Because of their lack of representation in the federal government, residents of Puerto Rico are not required to pay federal income tax. Puerto Rico also provides a sweetheart 4% income tax rate to people who move there from the mainland, which has attracted the sort of people who constantly complain about their taxes despite making more money in a year than most Americans will make in their lifetime.

One of those people is Logan Paul, who has decided to move there so he can keep more of his “posing with suicide victims” money that would otherwise just be wasted on things like roads and schools.

He photoshopped big anime tears in his eyes like he’s sad California is driving him away by taking all his money. He lives in a mansion.

Paul’s very next tweet is about how he spent a million dollars on Pokémon cards. Taxes are killing him, though.

Puerto Ricans are really rolling out the red carpet for him after his announcement.

Interestingly enough, Pokémon fans also see, annoyed with Paul because of the aforementioned box opening.

You see, ever since Paul started buying the cards and making videos about them, Pokémon cards have exploded in price and are impossible to find in stores. You’d think collectors would be happy about this, but since they’re not planning on selling their cards but want to play the game with them, all it’s done is brought in a bunch of new people who are going to buy up all the existing stock hoping to get rich and drive up prices for the people who have been playing the game forever.

When you do that with real estate, it’s called gentrification. Hope you like artisan bagels and craft beers, people of Puerto Rico, because someone is going to tear down your historic buildings to build them there because your neighborhood is just “Sah kyute.”

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Does ‘WandaVision’ Still Have a Big Surprise Cameo In Store For Us?

WandaVision has been a rollercoaster ride from start to, well, middle so far, and Disney’s decision to roll out the series weekly has been frustrating given all the secrets and cliffhangers, but it’s also given us the chance to dissect and pore over the details of each episode for a week in a way that fans really haven’t done since Lost was airing and people thought there might still be a plan behind it.

Elizabeth Olsen and Paul Bethany have both said in interviews that there’s a big surprise cameo coming, and that they were surprised it hadn’t been leaked.

And you may have assumed that it was Evan Peters coming on as Pietro, but Peters is a full-blown cast member and that did get leaked a while ago. Someone else is coming to Westview in the next three episodes, and I have some guesses as to who it might be, in no particular order.

John Krasinski

John Krasinski is a big name, but he’ll always be best-known as Jim from The Office. Episode 7 of WandaVision is reportedly an homage to The Office, and it would be something of a cast member from that show were to turn up.

Monica Rambeau mentioned having a friend who was an aerospace engineer she was planning to turn to for help safely penetrating the hex field around Westview in the last episode. You know who technically fits the bill as Marvel’s most famous aerospace engineer? Reed Richards, aka Mr. Fantastic of the Fantastic Four. This just so happens to be the role that John Krasinski has been rumored to be a lock for, alongside his wife Emily Blunt, for quite a while now.

This is what I most want to see happen. That aerospace engineer comment is a Chekhov’s gun that the show will have to resolve one way or another, and introducing Reed Richards to the MCU can’t happen soon enough for me. And it would be absolutely perfect if he showed up in an episode based around The Office.

But the engineer in question could be a number of other characters; even Sue Storm and Victor Von Doom fit the description, as does Riri Williams, who we already know is played by Dominique Thorne. Monica Rambeau in the comics had a love interest who was a physics professor, so he might also be the mystery character, though that would be far less exciting.

Benedict Cumberbatch

If the aerospace engineer isn’t our big cameo, then it could be Benedict Cumberbatch. This would actually make a lot of sense because WandaVision is presumably setting up plots that will continue into Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, which will co-star Elizabeth Olsen.

Strange could be the one to show up at the end and set things right, as well as taking Wanda under his wing as his apprentice to help her get her seemingly new hex powers under control. The Scarlet Witch in the comics had both her mutant hex powers and actual magic at her disposal, and Doctor Strange is the Sorcerer Supreme.

I also still think Agnes is up to something. She seemed to be leading Vision to the end of town and she still responded to Agnes when Vision “freed” her from “Wanda’s” control. She could be in league with one of Strange’s foes who wanted Wanda to create Billy and Tommy. Mephisto has been a leading contender for the ultimate mastermind, but Baron Mordo is still out there somewhere, too.

Sir Ian McKellan

This one has come up a lot but seems unlikely. McKellan played Magneto, the master of magnetism in the X-Men movies at Fox. Magneto just happens to be the father of Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch, and was explicitly the father of Evan Peters’ version of the character, though because of rights issues, the MCU’s Wanda and Pietro had unnamed parents who were killed in a bombing.

It meant something to Wanda for her brother Pietro to show up, even if it wasn’t the same Pietro she remembered. If Magneto turns out to be Wanda and Pietro’s real father in the MCU, Wanda never knew him and it just wouldn’t have the same impact.

Granted, it would be amazing to see Sir Ian show up one more time as Magneto

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Gina Carano Finally Appears to Have Gotten Herself Fired From ‘The Mandalorian’

You might think that it’s difficult to be a Republican in Hollywood, but you’d be overlooking the fact that Kelsey Grammer and Patricia Heaton have had steady work for decades. They even had a show together, though it only ran for one season, and both sitcom veterans had shows to launch ABC’s Wednesday night block alongside the Courtney Cox vehicle Cougar Town and a scrappy little single-camera sitcom called Modern Family. Heaton’s The Middle ran for nearly as long as Modern Family, too, and built up a decent following of traditional TV viewers.

See, Heaton and Grammer are Republicans, but they’re not assholes. When a left-wing blogger named Allison Kilkenny wrote a not-very-flattering piece about Grammer’s stake in a now-defunct right-wing news network, Grammer sent her an apple pie as a peace offering.

Gina Carano thinks it’s very difficult to be a Republican, though. In fact, she likened being a Republican to being a Jewish victim of the pogroms that preceded the Holocaust.

No, really. That’s a thing an adult human being sat and thought about and said “yeah, this seems fine.”

Carano deleted the post, but it initially read “Jews were beaten in the streets, not by Nazi soldiers but by their neighbors…even by children. Because history is edited, most people today don’t realize that to get to the point where Nazi soldiers could easily round up thousands of Jews, the government first made their own neighbors hate them simply for being Jews. How is that any different from hating someone for their political views?”

Lots of ways, Gina. For example, the person who was whipping people up into violent frenzies isn’t in the government anymore.

Disney had actually given Carano a wide berth to say whatever she wanted on social media without consequence, something she wouldn’t have gotten if her opinions on the persecution she faces from people disagreeing with her in public actually reflected reality. But this appears to have been a bridge too far because Carano seems to have been fired from The Mandalorian, with Lucasfilm telling Variety “Gina Carano is not currently employed by Lucasfilm and there are no plans for her to be in the future. Nevertheless, her social media posts denigrating people based on their cultural and religious identities are abhorrent and unacceptable.”

Now, you can parse that a couple of ways because I don’t think guest stars are technically employees and the only name in the credits of The Mandalorian is Pedro Pascal. I don’t think Lucas would have put this statement out if they planned to have her as a guest star in season three. Definitely not if she was going to be headlining Rangers of the New Republic.

While I’m sure Walt would love Gina Carano and everything she stands for, that’s not exactly the image Disney wants to present today.

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What The Hell Actually Just Happened on ‘WandaVision’

WandaVision has been a very strange show, and it’s not getting any less strange as it goes on, despite episode four’s brief foray into the real world. Episode five, On a Very Special Episode…, cranked up the weirdness surrounding Wanda and Vision’s sitcom world right from the beginning.

At the center of it, once again, was Kathryn Hahn’s Agnes, who started the show by asking Wanda and Vision if they wanted her to do another take in the middle of a conversation about newborn twins Billy and Tommy. Agnes was completely unfazed when the twins aged themselves up to five and then ten years old, practically right in front of her, and Wanda and Vision had a heated argument when Wanda used her powers in front of Agnes, who again acted oblivious.

We did find out that Wanda knows the world she’s in isn’t real; she dramatically exited Westview, reclaimed her Eastern European accent and told S.W.O.R.D. to leave her alone before reenforcing the magic field around Westview with red energy.

Everyone at S.W.O.R.D. seems convinced Wanda is behind all the strangeness in Westview, but Agnes is always just showing up when Wanda needs help with something or she and Vision need distracting. Everything strange that happens inside what Darcy calls “The Hex” happens around Agnes. When we saw Wanda use her powers on it, they were red. Wanda’s hex powers are always red. If she’s the one trapping everyone inside, why isn’t the energy field red to begin with?

Also, our biggest piece of proof that Wanda is behind the weirdness is the tape of her stealing Vision’s body from S.W.O.R.D., but as Darcy points out, Vision didn’t want to be turned into a weapon after he was killed, so what exactly was S.W.O.R.D. studying him for? Just last episode Monica told S.W.O.R.D.’s director “It says ‘Observation and Response’ on that door, not ‘Creation.’” Vision sure looked like he was being studied to me, but to what end?

Speaking of Vision, he managed to break the spell over his workmate Norm, who said a woman was in his head and that the mind control was painful. Vision, like us in the audience, assumes he means Wanda, who does display a good deal of control over the sitcom reality of Westview, trying to roll the credits to avoid a fight with Vision, which Vision isn’t having.

As Wanda starts to tell Vision she’s not controlling the people in the neighborhood and that she doesn’t know how it started, there’s a knock at the door, and Wanda swears to Vision she isn’t responsible. When she answers the door, it’s her brother Pietro… kind of. Darcy exclaims “She recast Pietro!?” and we get a good look at Evan Peters, who played Quicksilver in the X-Men movies and was a much superior version of Quicksilver to the MCU’s.

Remember when I said Agnes always seems to be around to provide a distraction? She was also heavily involved in the episode’s sitcom plot, which involved Billy and Tommy getting a dog that dies eating Agnes’s azaleas. The twins beg Wanda to bring the dog back to life, telling her “you have to bring him back, he’s family,” in a way reminiscent of episode two’s chorus of “for the children” before Wanda ended up pregnant.

Wanda has a level of control over the sitcom reality because of her powers and awareness that it isn’t real, but I think she was being honest when she told Vision it wasn’t her doing. Wanda is hurt and broken and maybe a little crazy, but she’s not malevolent. I think she had a good reason to take Vision’s body, to uphold his wish that it not be used to make more weapons, and I think she’s found herself wrapped up in someone else’s plot in Westview.

But the big question is how did this new Pietro get to the MCU and is he really the same Peter Maximoff we saw in the X-Men films? It would be incredibly anti-climactic to find out “oh, it’s just an Easter egg” and he’s just some brainwashed resident playing a part like the rest of Westview. And he had the same general demeanor as Quicksilver.

WandaVision is tied to Spider-Man 3 (rumored to be subtitled Homeworlds) and Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness, both of which deal with the concept of a multiverse, which the Fox X-Men films would be a part of. It seems like someone looking to keep Wanda and Vision from working together and comparing notes on Westview could have plucked an alternate version of Wanda’s brother from the multiverse and placed him in Westview as a distraction. But who could have possibly done such a thing, what is her ultimate plan and where does she get those stylish broaches from?

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Awards Season Starts Today, the Golden Globe Nominations are Here

It’s not unusual for most people not to have seen or even heard of most of the movies nominated for awards in any given year; the Oscars even considered adding a category for movies people had actually seen in addition to their current top honor, “Best Holocaust Drama Released in Late December on 12 Screens in Brentwood.”

This year, however, you’ve really never heard of the nominated films because even those twelve screens were closed for most of the year due to the coronavirus pandemic.

Here’s a look at what dramas are nominated.


  • THE FATHER (Trademark Films; Sony Pictures Classics)
  • MANK (Netflix; Netflix)
  • NOMADLAND  (Highwayman / Hear/Say / Cor Cordium; Searchlight Pictures)
  • PROMISING YOUNG WOMAN (LuckyChap Entertainment / FilmNation Entertainment; Focus Features)
  • THE TRIAL OF THE CHICAGO 7 (Marc Platt Productions / Dreamworks Pictures; Netflix)





Even the movies that were on Netflix don’t sound familiar, and you can’t go five minutes without seeing an ad for something on Netflix. I do recall hearing about The Trial of the Chicago 7 at one point, but I’m still assuming Mank will win because it’s the sort of “Hollywood are the real heroes” stories that awards voters love.

There were so few movies released this year that the Golden Globes had to nominate comedies for Best Comedy or Musical.


  • BORAT SUBSEQUENT MOVIEFILM (Four By Two Films; Amazon Studios)
  • HAMILTON (Walt Disney Pictures / RadicalMedia / 5000 Broadway Productions / NEVIS Productions / Old 320 Sycamore Pictures; Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures)
  • MUSIC (Pineapple Lasagne Productions / Landay Entertainment; Vertical Entertainment / IMAX)
  • PALM SPRINGS (Party Over Here / Limelight Productions; NEON / Hulu)
  • THE PROM (Netflix / Dramatic Forces / Storykey Entertainment; Netflix)





Of course Hamilton is going to win. There’s nothing in the world rich white people like more than Hamilton. Personally, I would probably give it to Palm Springs, which managed to be a funny and deep tale on a premise you probably rolled your eyes at when you heard it.


  • THE CROWN – NETFLIX (Left Bank Pictures / Sony Pictures Television)
  • LOVECRAFT COUNTRY – HBO (HBO / Afemme / Monkeypaw / Bad Robot / Warner Bros. Television)
  • THE MANDALORIAN – DISNEY+ (Lucasfilm Ltd.)
  • OZARK – NETFLIX (MRC Television)
  • RATCHED – NETFLIX (Fox21 Television Studios)





I think this comes down to Ozark and The Crown, even though neither of those shows thought to go “Hey, remember Boba Fett and Luke Skywalker. They were pretty cool. What if we make them even cooler so adults watching with their kids feel like kids again?”


  • EMILY IN PARIS – NETFLIX (Darren Star Productions / Jax Media / MTV Studios)
  • THE FLIGHT ATTENDANT – HBO MAX (HBO Max / Berlanti Productions / Yes, Norman Productions / Warner Bros. Television)
  • THE GREAT – HULU (Hulu / Civic Center Media / MRC)
  • SCHITT’S CREEK – POP TV (Not A Real Company Productions / Canadian Broadcast Company / Pop TV)
  • TED LASSO – APPLE TV+ (Apple / Doozer Productions / Warner Bros. Television / Universal Television)





Schitt’s Creek is going to sweep everything this year. That show became a cultural phenomenon and they’re going to reward the final season with bags full of award statues. And I get that you love Jane Levy but you’re going to have to live with the fact that you nominated Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist for an award for the rest of human existence. Hope it was worth it.

Of course, the old expression in Hollywood is “you win and Oscar, you buy a Golden Globe,” so it might come down to who has the best “For Your Consideration” campaign. So don’t count out Emily in Paris, Netflix loves to spend money on awards.

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Descrambling ‘WandaVision’ Episode 4

We’re four episodes into WandaVision, not quite to the halfway point, and it has become the event TV series of the season. Sure, more people have probably watched Bridgerton or Cobra Kai over on Netflix, but what people are talking about is WandaVision.

Part of the reason for that is that no one knows what the hell is going on with it. WandaVision is Marvel Studios’ first foray into weekly, episodic television and they’ve deftly combined the aesthetic of classic sitcoms with the slight uneasiness you get during every episode of Twin Peaks.

Episode four pulled back the curtain, showed what’s been going on in the real world while Scarlet Witch and Vision live their idyllic sitcom lives and somewhat frustratingly managed to do that without really answering any of the questions the show has created to this point.

We Interrupt This Program could have been the first episode of the series, and in a way it was, even though it aired fourth. We were re-introduced to Darcy Lewis from Thor, Jimmy Woo from Ant-Man and Monica Rambeau from Captain Marvel as they look for answers about why the town of Westview, New Jersey has gone missing, and we see that they are also watching Wanda’s sitcom adventures as a sitcom, with Darcy and Jimmy actually discussing it like it’s a sitcom, even though there are some glitches in the broadcast when Wanda changes reality.

We did get one major answer in this episode, and that is who are the residents of Westview. The answer, shockingly, is that they’re missing persons, presumably citizens of the real Westview, pulled into Wanda’s fantasy world and force to play their parts.

Our dutiful agents of S.W.O.R.D. (it’s like S.H.I.E.L.D. but for outer space) have identified all of the citizens on the “show,” too. Almost.

Agnes and Dottie are conspicuously not identified with the rest of the “actors,” and we’ve thought there was something different about them since the beginning. The leading theory is Agnes is Agatha Harkness, the Fantastic Four’s nanny and Wanda’s mentor in the mystic arts. Wanda’s ill-defined mutant powers in the comic let her warp reality, but Agatha Harkness taught the Scarlet Witch how to be an actual witch on top of her powers, though she also used Wanda for her own ends. It hasn’t escaped the notice of the Internet that Agnes is a portmanteau of Agatha Harkness, either.

Dottie, played by Emma Caufield, is a little less obvious, though the leading theory seems to be that she could be Clea, Dr. Strange’s apprentice, given that WandaVision is part of a trilogy with Spider-Man 3 and Doctor Strange: Multiverse of Madness that promises to explore the Marvel multiverse.

And then there was that one moment that pulled back the curtain on Wanda’s reality. We see that she can use her powers, her real powers, inside her TV reality and while doing so to eject Monica from Westview and repair the damage that it causes, she catches a glimpse of Vision that comes at the audience like one of those animatronic animals in Five Nights at Freddy’s; he’s dull and dead with a massive hole in his head where Thanos ripped the Mind Gem from him to complete the Infinity Gauntlet. It was one of the most unsettling things I’ve seen in a Marvel project.

When Monica returns to the real world, putting the end of this episode concurrent with the end of the previous episode, She says “It’s all Wanda.” Is it, though?

We know, and have known, why Wanda would want to be in this reality; Vision is in it with her and it’s the only way he can be. That glimpse of him dead but animated gives the impression that he isn’t really back from the dead and he’ll only be alive in the confines of the sitcom reality of Westview, but did Wanda really create that reality. We know that she likes it, she’s happy there and she wants to maintain the illusion, and we’ve seen her subconsciously and consciously using her powers to do just that over the first three episodes, but did she create the illusion or was it created for her for some purpose.

The birth of her twin sons has lead to a lot of speculation that Mephisto, Marvel’s version of the devil, is behind it, working through Agnes and Dotty who would both be powerful witches, in order to get Wanda to have children. In the comics, Wanda’s twins were shards of Mephisto’s soul summoned by Wanda’s magic and then banished by Agatha Harkness. I don’t think that is going to be the exact story here, but there could be plenty of reasons behind a rough outline of “Mephisto wants Wanda to have Rosemary’s babies” and for Agnes and Dottie to be his servants.

The problem with that version of the theory is that Agatha Harkness and Clea aren’t villains and don’t work for Mephisto. Agatha Harkness rather pointedly works against him, both with Wanda and Franklin Richards. Of course, being heroes in the comics doesn’t mean they can’t be villains here.

It is clear that some force wanted Wanda to have children, though. The fundraiser in episode two bringing about those creepy, unison “for the children” chants leading to Wanda magically becoming pregnant was no coincidence.

That’s what we know so far: someone created Westview to give Wanda what she wanted, a normal life with Vision so that Wanda would give them what they wanted, Billy and Tommy. We don’t know who it is or what their goal is, but we know Wanda finds the illusion preferable to reality.

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Day Traders on Reddit Totally Blew Up the Stock Market

The stock market is essentially gambling. I think we’ve all suspected this, but it’s really been laid bare in the past week.

Theoretically, the purpose of the stock market is to allow businesses to raise capital by selling shares in their company to a large number of small investors who then all share in the profits the business makes instead of having to rely on a few extremely wealthy investors to put in large dollar amounts.

But then there are stock buy-backs and short sales. Stock buybacks are when a company takes its profits and instead of investing them in the business or paying it out to the employees who did the work that created that wealth, they buy shares of stock to take them off the market which allows them to push the price of their stock higher and make more money for their shareholders.

Short sales are essentially betting that a business will fail. You take a stock someone else owns and sell it with a promise to buy those shares back in the future when you think it will be at a lower price and you can keep the difference in price.

Elon Musk hates people who short Tesla and it seems to be the reason he keeps getting into trouble with the SEC. Reddit loves Elon Musk and the day traders at r/wallstreetbets have taken his cue and have gone after short-sellers at major hedge funds who drove down the stock price of GameStop, the video game retailer, to about $3 a share.

What they figured out, essentially, was that if they bought all the GameStop stock they could, when it came time for the short sellers to buy back that stock, they would not only take a huge haircut, but that money would go to the day traders.

And it did. To the tune of billions of dollars.

The thing about short selling is that it doesn’t have any positive benefit other than it makes money for the people doing the shorting if they’re right. And those people are a bunch of whiny little bitches who are crying for Redditors to go to jail because they made the money that was there to be made in this gamble instead of the big Wall Street banks.

Jon Stewart signed up for Twitter to comment on that.

I’m with Jon here. The little guys took billions from people looking to get richer off of the collapse of a business that employs around 50,000 people.

I wouldn’t buy GameStop stock now, though. They really don’t have a sustainable business model in 2021 and it’s not a $300 stock.

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Did Kellyanne Conway Really Post a Naked Picture of Her Underage Daughter on Twitter?

If you’re not familiar with the QAnon conspiracy theory, I have some quick bullet points that I need to give you before we get into this story. Basically, an alarming number of adult humans have taken as gospel a random 4chan poster who claimed that Donald Trump was secretly working behind the scenes to bring down a cabal of Satan-worshiping child molesters who were all conveniently in the political party the believers of the conspiracy voted against.

Ultimately, the storm never came because Donald Trump is just a mediocre businessman who ran an inept presidential administration and there isn’t a secret cabal of powerful pedophiles led by Tom Hanks and Nancy Pelosi draining children’s adrenal glands to extant their own lives. Or something.

There is a scandal involving a government figure and child pornography, though it’s not exactly what the Q people thought it would be.

Kellyanne Conway, Donald Trump’s former campaign manager and senior advisor, posted a naked picture of her 16-year-old daughter on Twitter, using the social media website’s new “Fleets” feature. Or at least someone posted said picture to Conway’s account.

See, Conway’s daughter Claudia, who has become something of an Internet celebrity for speaking against her mother’s politics, initially blamed her mother, saying “nobody would ever have any photo like that, ever. So, Kellyanne, you’re going to fucking jail.” Now, Kellyanne likely won’t be going to jail, a topless picture probably doesn’t actually qualify as child pornography even if the subject is underage; if it did, everyone who watched American Beauty would be in jail. But we’re still not going to host or link to the picture, you perverts.

Claudia changed her mind later, though, with TMZ reporting she posted a video defending her mother and saying she would never do anything like post a naked picture of her daughter on social media.

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Rumor: Ellen DeGeneres is on Her Way Out, Kelly Clarkson Will Get Her Timeslot

Ellen DeGeneres might just be at the end of her reign as the queen of daytime TV. Ellen’s show, which she all but inherited from Rosie O’Donnell mixed the celebrity interviews and monologue format of late-night talk shows with the prizes and giveaways of daytime shows like Oprah and Live with Regis and Kathy Lee. Even though I think Ellen was a fantastic stand-up comic, her daytime show brought her the kind of fame and adoration she never really got from stand-up or prime time sitcoms.

That has all come crashing down around her with reports that she’s not as nice backstage as her public image lead people to believe.

Ellen thought she could weather the storm by passing the buck and throwing some producers under the bus, but since her return to daytime TV her ratings are down and her contract is almost at an end.

Page Six reports that her replacement has become obvious as she enters negotiations next month about the future of her show, and it’s The Kelly Clarkson Show that airs right after Ellen in most markets.

We’re told that NBC chiefs wooed pop star Clarkson, 38, for years before she launched her eponymous show — produced and distributed by NBCUniversal Domestic Television Distribution — in September 2019.

It became the most-watched new daytime talk show in seven years, winning three Daytime Emmys last year, including one for Clarkson as best entertainment talk show host.

Last month, “The Kelly Clarkson Show” hit a season high — and matched DeGeneres’ numbers for the first time.

Of course, Telepictures, the production company behind The Ellen DeGeneres Show and not The Kelly Clarkson Show, is likely to look to replace Ellen the way that she replaced Rosie O’Donnell after she ended her similarly-formatted TV show in 2002 and hold onto the 3 PM timeslot.

We could be looking at a daytime talk show war of the kind that’s usually reserved for late-night shuffles involving Jay Leno.

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What the Hell Even Is ‘WandaVision’?

WandaVision is the kind of show that could only happen on a streaming service as a piece of a larger cinematic universe, neither of which really existed 15 years ago. If we didn’t already know who the Vision and the Scarlet Witch were, the slow burn of the first two episodes would be completely nonsensical.

We do know who the Vision and the Scarlet Witch, though, and we know that they don’t live in a meticulous recreation of Rob and Laura Petrie’s house from The Dick Van Dyke Show. Dick Van Dyke himself even advised the makers of WandaVision on getting the look and feel of his eponymous sitcom which turns 60 this year just right.

But it’s not quite right. It feels like typical Dick Van Dyke when Wanda burns the roast when Vision’s boss comes over for dinner, but then he angrily starts questioning her: “Where are you from? Why did you move here? How did you meet?” Wanda and Vision don’t really have answers for this, and then Vision’s boss starts to choke, nearly to death. It’s a long, uncomfortable scene that goes on longer than you’d think before Vision saves him.

But after that, it turns out the boss really likes the couple and Vision is getting that promotion at work after all, even though he doesn’t know and no one can tell him what the company actually does.

In the second episode, Wanda and Vision’s house is suddenly, with no explanation, a replica of the Stephens’ house from Bewitched. And then the queen bee of the neighborhood asks Wanda some questions she doesn’t have an answer for and a glass explodes in her hand, and we see her blood is red despite everything else being black and white.

Finally, at the end of the episode, a man in a beekeeper costume with a strange logo on the back (it’s the logo S.W.O.R.D., S.H.I.E.L.D.’s intergalactic counterpart in the comics) emerges from the sewer, surrounded by bees, there to “rescue” Wanda. Wanda says no and then the episode rewinds like a VHS tape and Wanda decides to stay in the house with Vision where they magically turn to color the way a lot of TV shows did in the 1970s.

This should all sound insane to you, because you just watched an hour of television without the faintest idea what’s actually going on. This would never have happened on linear television, where networks would demand some sort of resolution or deeper explanation at the end of the first episode. In a movie, this sitcom setting would be the first act, and we’d have already had the break into two where Wanda and Vision let loose with their powers in a romp before the central confrontation begins.

WandaVision is the first Marvel project we’ve seen in over a year and it’s also the first to step outside of a strict mold. There’s no doubting that every Marvel movie so far has been good; even the bad ones were still fine, maybe a B-/C at worst. Now, with this, with WandaVision, they’re actually doing something different. It’s a weird show that revels in its weirdness and it appears that it will continue its slightly unsettling and frustrating slow burn across several episodes, presenting sitcom episodes that wrap their plot up with a neat little bow but ironically deny the audience any closure or feeling of relief.

We as audience members think we know what’s going on. We’ve seen the trailers, we have a pretty good idea that Wanda has created this sitcom pocket reality after some sort of mental break to give herself the life she could have had before Thanos killed Vision. But we don’t know that for sure. And just when we thought we were going to get some sort of hint at the big picture, Wanda herself told us no, we’re not.

I have found that the Marvel Cinematic Universe at times feels like I got my greatest childhood wish granted by a monkey’s paw; I’ve always loved super-heroes and the movies are genuinely good but there is clearly such a thing as too much of a good thing.

But a year-long wait for a project that breaks the mold of what Marvel is and has been is exactly the sort of pallet cleanser I needed to be optimistic that Marvel’s Phase Four is on the right path. For right now, there’s nothing else quite like WandaVision on television, and that’s not something I thought I’d ever say about a Marvel project again.

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Wait, Is All That Crazy Stuff About Armie Hammer Actually True?

Yesterday we heard Armie Hammer had left a movie he was about to start filming because some alleged DMs from the star were leaked the supposedly showed him being into some pretty weird sex stuff, like beyond BDSM and into cannibalism and asking his lover of she’d cut off her toe so he could carry a piece of her around with him.

Now, we still don’t have proof that these DMs are authentic, but Hammer’s ex-girlfriend Courtney Vucekovich talked to Page Six about how the content of those messages does line up with the stuff she claims he was into when they were dating. Which is frankly insane.

“He said to me he wants to break my rib and barbecue and eat it,” app founder Courtney Vucekovich exclusively told Page Six.

Now, we’ve all gone a step or two too far when we’re with someone and they’re like “oh, talk dirty to me, spank me,” or whatever you’re into. This sounds like it’s beyond that.

“‘F–k that was weird,’ but you never think about it again,” she said of overlooking the odd behavior at the time. “He says, ‘I want to take a bite out of you.’ If I had a little cut on my hand, he’d like suck it or lick it. That’s about as weird as we got.”

I dated a girl with a vampire fetish once so that’s not too far out there, honestly. If these allegations are true, it sounds like Hammer would have a cannibal role-play fetish more than actually wanting to eat or disfigure someone.

“He likes the idea of skin in his teeth,” she claims.

That’s not really the disturbing part. This stuff is more funny than disturbing, like those weird Japanese porno comics where someone eats their partner after sex. I never thought those were actually supposed to be erotic, I always thought they were supposed to be gross and funny but it takes all kinds of fruit to make a fruit cup, I guess.

The actual disturbing part is that Vucekovich claims Hammer was emotionally abusive to the point that she had to seek in-patient care for PTSD after ending the relationship, which only lasted a few months.

At one point, Vucekovich found herself paying for everything, including gas for his truck, because he’s allegedly broke.

“He needs you,” she said. “He actually needs you.”

“It’s a full-time job when you’re with him the way that I was,” she explained. “I was trying to catch my breath the entire time I was with him. You’re drowning in this dark hole trying to stay afloat. There will be random moments of good that convince you to stay.”

Vucekovich said the relationship ended following an explosive fight and Hammer left.

“He blows up [women’s] lives like that and walks away,” she said.

If you recall, Hammer’s ex Jessica Ciencin Henrique also referred to Hammer as an abuser.

I’m not honestly sure if the picture that Vucekovich paints of Hammer is that of an abuser or of someone so damaged that he just damages everyone around him whether he means to or not. But either way, if these allegations are true, Hammer will need to seek some serious help for his issues.

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Armie Hammer Left a Film Role Over an Insane, Possibly Fake DM Leak

People are making a lot of accusations about celebrities that are pretty hard to believe, and this is after everyone very easily believed Matt Lauer had a rape button on his desk at Today.

Someone leaked DMs that are supposedly from actor Armie Hammer and they seem really fake. If they’re not fake, whenever you read a really fucked up Japanese porno comic and say “who is this for?” the answer is Armie Hammer.

But it’s not, these are almost certainly fake.

So what do they say? Glad you asked. According to The Daily Mail, Hammer told a woman “I am 100% a cannibal. I want to eat you.” He also allegedly told her “I need to drink your blood. Why the distance?”

It’s all stuff along those lines, weird BDSM, master and slave, 50 Shades of Grey stuff.

Hammer stepped away from a role in the Jennifer Lopez film Shotgun Wedding because of the accusations, telling Deadline “I’m not responding to these bullshit claims but in light of the vicious and spurious online attacks against me, I cannot in good conscience now leave my children for 4 months to shoot a film in the Dominican Republic. Lionsgate is supporting me in this and I’m grateful to them for that.”

Now, could there be any truth to these supposedly leaked DMs? Well, they haven’t been verified so I would take them with a grain of salt. But The Daily Mail does point out that Hammer does appear to have some interest in the whole BDSM kink thing.

Hammer previously made headlines of a similar nature in 2017, after he liked a series of tweets about BDSM sex acts.

Hammer’s ex Jessica Ciencin Henriquez tweeted “If you are still questioning whether or not those Armie Hammer DMs are real (and they are) maybe you should start questioning why we live in a culture willing to give abusers the benefit of the doubt instead of victims.”

Even if these alleged DMs are real, the worst thing about them is Hammer was married at the time. There’s nothing abusive in them that I’ve seen, just some really weird BDSM role play stuff a scorned ex released to embarrass him. Ask yourself if your ex could leak DMs that would embarrass you if everyone read them.

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Deadpool Is Coming to the MCU and He’s Keeping His R-Rating

Disney cares about a lot of things, and one of those things is its squeaky-clean family-friendly image. The reason they care about this is because they want everyone, from the super-religious households that homeschool their kids to the hippies who send their kids to schools made of kale with a headmaster who’s a yogi, to take their kids to Disneyland and Disney World and give them money.

Disney also wants the money that the Marvel movies bring in, which is why none of those movies have been moved to streaming during the same time period that Warner moved all of their movies to HBO Max; there’s too much potential profit to cut their losses and make back what they can.

These two desires came crashing into each other when Disney bought Fox and Marvel reacquired the film rights to the X-Men spinoff Deadpool, the most successful R-Rated movie franchise ever.

It turns out that money wins and Kevin Feige told Collider that Marvel was working on an R-Rated Deadpool film.

It will be rated R and we are working on a script right now, and Ryan’s overseeing a script right now… It will not be [filming] this year. Ryan is a very busy, very successful actor. We’ve got a number of things we’ve already announced that we now have to make, but it’s exciting for it to have begun. Again, a very different type of character in the MCU, and Ryan is a force of nature, which is just awesome to see him bring that character to life.

Ryan Reynolds had a great tweet about the news, too.

This is maybe the best news we’ve heard since Disney bought Fox. And not just about the studios, just in general. There hasn’t been a lot of good news in the past year or so.

It’ll be interesting to see what Deadpool does in the Marvel Universe and how the film addresses the change of realities. Deadpool is like She-Hulk and Harley Quinn in being one of those self-aware characters who knows they’re fictional and a lot of humor comes from that. It’s a relief to know that Marvel will be taking care to keep giving us the kind of experience we got with the first two Deadpool films.

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‘Cobra Kai’ Exemplifies all the Strengths and Weaknesses of Streaming TV

The number one show on Netflix for the past few days has been Cobra Kai, a sequel to the 1980s Karate Kid movie series. That is just as insane a fact as it sounds. The Karate Kid movies weren’t even that good; They were fine but they weren’t Back to the Future or The Princess Bride or anything like that. On top of that, the basic concept for the show, that Johnny Lawrence from the Cobra Kai dojo isn’t such a bad guy and Daniel LaRusso isn’t such a good guy, was essentially created from a joke on an episode of How I Met Your Mother that Ralph Macchio and William Zabka guest-starred on.

Somehow this mess of an idea based on an okay movie you probably haven’t watched in 30 years actually works really well, and it probably has binge-watching on streaming to thank for that. I watched all 30 episodes of Cobra Kai in two weekends; I watched the two seasons that had premiered on YouTube about a week before Christmas and I watched season 3 on New Year’s Day when it premiered.

I don’t think I would have tuned in to watch this if I had to wait a week between episodes. I may have, I watch Riverdale and The Big Bang Theory so I’m something of a connoisseur of terrible television, but a big part of the appeal of Cobra Kai was the ability to throw it on while I was playing a Switch game I had picked up during the winter sales we just had.

The show is practically built on tracking the characters’ shifting allegiances, and the driving plot is the will-they-or-won’t-they between Daniel LaRusso and Johnny Lawrence; they don’t have a romantic relationship, but over the first three seasons their friendship is played a lot like Sam and Diane or Ross and Rachel, where they clearly both want to be friends and bury the hatchet but plot contrivances push them apart time and again.

Did I mention the allegiances are to karate dojos? It’s one thing when the teen cast, consisting of Daniel’s daughter Sam, Johnny’s estranged son Robby and Johnny’s first student Miguel and their friends, fight over who goes to the best karate dojo, but it’s a little hard to swallow when adults do, something the show is actually very aware of and has some meta jokes about.

The return of Cobra Kai’s sensei from the first Karate Kid, John Kreese, really amps how insane the plot is. Johnny and Daniel have an almost friendly rivalry in the first season but Kreese is basically a cartoon supervillain pulled from Power Rangers or Captain Planet. You really have to suspend your disbelief when Kreese is around because (spoiler for the season 3 finale if you haven’t watched it) at one point he tries to straight-up murder Johnny and Daniel, and his motivation for doing so is pretty hazy. I think it’s just about winning an annual karate tournament but Kreese acts like he’s still in Vietnam.

Cobra Kai does get into Kreese’s backstory as a POW in Vietnam and shows him, at times, to be a complex human who honestly thinks he’s shaping his students to be ready for life. But I don’t know what level of PTSD you need to be on to think that you need to murder people in the name of your karate dojo.

The ability to pick up the show when you want and binge watch it were pluses that drove a lot of people to check out Cobra Kai, but there is one huge drawback to streaming that I think is also going to hurt Cobra Kai; it could be over a year before any new episodes show up. Season 3 was completed and unaired when Netflix bought the show after YouTube Red cancelled it, but season 4 hasn’t even started production yet. I don’t know if people are going to be counting the days for an entire year to see more of this show. It’s not exactly Game of Thrones, even if it treats karate lessons with the same gravitas as fighting dragons.

Ultimately, Cobra Kai is a show about Johnny Lawrence and William Zabka really makes Johnny a likable guy. It’s funny how the one-dimension 80s high school bully can become the emotional core of a show like this, but it actually kind of works.

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Lucasfilm Exec Makes Fun of YouTuber for Liking ‘Star Wars’

One of the things that fans hated about Star Wars: The Last Jedi was that it appeared to be filled with contempt for Star Wars fans. The underlying theme of the film was that everything you loved about those movies as a kid was bullshit and the lesson you should have learned is to always listen to old white ladies.

It’s becoming more and more obvious that some of the people responsible for making Star Wars do think you’re an idiot for liking Star Wars.

You see, Star Wars did something this year that I thought was impossible after a trilogy of movies whose best idea was “f**k it, a third Death Star, I guess,” and made people actually like Star Wars. Jon Favreau and Dave Filoni took The Mandalorian and used it to redeem Star Wars, even filling Werner Herzog with childlike glee at the magic they had captured on film.

One of the most popular Star Wars YouTubers, Toos, put a video on his channel Star Wars Theory of his reaction to the second-season finale of The Mandalorian in which he was moved to tears by the appearance of Jedi Knight Luke Skywalker, who heard Grogu’s call through the force and came to train him in The Force. It was a big moment and I was amazed that the show had managed to take both Boba Fett and Luke Skywalker and make them even cooler than they were when I was eight and watching Star Wars on VHS for the first time. And it was actually pretty emotionally moving to see Grogu and Din Djarin part ways, even though I suspect that Grogu will be back and more active in assisting The Mandalorian in the future, much the same way Daigoro became a partner to his father in the later parts of Lone Wolf and Cub.

If you’re a LucasFilm executive and someone has a genuine emotional response to one of your films, probably for the first time since 1983, what would your reaction be? Would it be to get on Twitter and make fun of him? Because that was Pablo Hidalgo’s reaction, as reported by Variety.

That’s when he learned what Hidalgo tweeted: “emotions are not for sharing.” Toos was outraged, interpreting Hidalgo’s remarks as indeed piling on the mockery of his genuine emotions. By that point, Hidalgo had deleted the tweet, but, rather inexplicably, he also put a screenshot of it as the banner over his account; Toos took it as more trolling. “You’re telling people it’s not ok to have emotions about the work your company produces, and you make fun of them for crying?” he tweeted. “Not ok.”

Hidalgo apologized and claimed he was just poking fun at his own stoicism.

It’s not great, though, because it really doesn’t take much for Star Wars fans to get the impression the people in charge of Star Wars now really don’t like them, and some of them have basically come right out and said it. This isn’t really going to help things, regardless of what Hidalgo meant.

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Gal Gadot Accused of White Washing for Playing a White Woman

There is some historical argument over what race the ancient Egyptians were; they may have been Black or they may have been Caucasians of similar complexion to today’s Egyptian population. We’re not really sure because it’s feasible either or both groups lived in the area at the time and you can’t actually tell someone’s skin color from their skeleton.

One thing we do know, however, is Cleopatra was neither, she and her family line were Southern European. She was like, white white, and also probably not as hot as you’ve been lead to believe.

The point is that people accusing Gal Gadot of whitewashing don’t actually know what they’re mad about, they just want to be mad.

Cleopatra was probably whiter than Gal Gadot, who is Israeli, and the last time I checked Israel was in the Middle East and in fact shares a border with Egypt.

Lexi Alexander, the dumbest person in Hollywood, appears to have deleted a tweet saying Cleopatra should be played by a black actress and claiming Cleopatra was black. Hanna Flint of The Guardian claimed casting Gadot as Cleopatra was an example of “Hollywood’s colonization of ethnicity,” a take that misses the fact that Cleopatra and the entire Ptolemy dynasty were literally colonizers. The founder of Cleopatra’s dynasty, Ptolemy I, was a Macedonian and a bodyguard and close friend of Alexander the Great.

Gal Godot addressed the controversy, telling the BBC “First of all if you want to be true to the facts then Cleopatra was Macedonian. We were looking for a Macedonian actress that could fit Cleopatra. She wasn’t there, and I was very passionate about Cleopatra.”

Now don’t get me wrong, I think it’s a good thing that we’re seeing more diverse faces on television and in movies. Hollywood has long considered casting anyone who wasn’t white or Will Smith in a leading role in a major film to be “risky” so it’s good that things are changing. But when people do things like this, claiming a white woman playing a white woman is whitewashing, that’s when people start to tune out your movement as a whole, even when you’re making good points.

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