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Lindsay Marie Shows Her Cooter on a Scooter

It seems like only a month ago–spoiler alert, it was four weeks ago to the day—that we last caught up with Lindsay Marie showing off her naked body for our enjoyment. This time, Lindsay’s taking things on the road, however, hopping on her scooter and showing off her cooter. It’s a win-win of a road trip, if you ask me, which is more than one can hope for when presented with a road trip scenario.

I’ve never had much desire to buy a motorcycle or a scooter, mainly due to the lack of a backseat, but Lindsay Marie has shown us all that scooters can be sexual devices as well. It may seem like there’s nothing sexy about a scooter, and normally there isn’t, but when you slap a naked Lindsay Marie on that scooter, it suddenly becomes the sexiest mode of transportation known to man.

I don’t know that I’m going to run right out and buy a scooter in hopes of recreating this moment, particularly when I have no way of contacting Lindsay Marie to see if she’s down, but I’ll definitely pause the next time I walk past the local scooter dealership. I guarantee it.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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‘Bonding’ Star Zoe Levin Unbuttons Her Shirt for a Sexy Photoshoot

The new Netflix series Bonding seems like the kind of show you tell yourself you just don’t have time for, but allow me to counter that with two important things. First, none of the episodes runs longer than 20 minutes, meaning you can watch the entire series in a shade over two hours. Second, the show stars the gorgeous Zoe Levin, who shows off her many sexy sides in this new photoshoot.

The 25 year old beauty has made a big impression in such films as The Way Way Back, Palo Alto, and on the TV series Arrested Development, but Bonding is her big breakout and she made the most of the moment. If you need any more convincing to watch this show, allow me to entice you by informing you that she plays a dominatrix on the show and spends a good deal of time in sexy leather get-ups.

So enjoy this gallery of sexy pics with Zoe Levin showing off with her shirt unbuttoned and then head over to Netflix to continue your newfound Zoe Levin obsession. She really is the chick to be obsessed with of the moment, so you might as well stop fighting the temptation.

Photos courtesy of MEGA

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Gabriela Giovanardi Charts a Course for Naked Fun in the Sun

If you live in the Midwest, you’re currently suffering through one last gasp of winter, which makes this new photo set featuring Gabriela Giovanardi celebrating a little naked fun in the Mexican sun all the more necessary. After a taste of spring weather, we all got snapped back to reality this weekend with snow, rain, and a miserable forecast over the next few days.

It’s a good things Gabriela Giovanardi and her immaculate naked body are here to give you that Vitamin D boost that nature has been depriving you of thus far this spring. It’s normally a time to get out and celebrate the sun after a long winter spent indoors, but Gabriela Giovanardi is bringing the outdoors to you. Seriously, tell me you don’t feel at least a tiny endorphin rush after looking at Gabriela in the altogether.

I’m sure summer will be here soon enough, likely bypassing spring entirely in these confusing times, but until it does finally rear its head, check out the rear and head of Gabriela Giovanardi. She’s that little taste of summer you need to keep you going over these next few long days of winter going out like a bitch baby.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Grab Some Sex Wax and Buff Your Board to Kamila Joanna

As the warmer weather approaches, we’re all getting cabin fever and dreaming of the days we’ll spend on the beaches looking at the peaches. Kamila Joanna is getting a head start on the rest of us by grabbing her surfboard, giving it a solid coating of sex wax, and hitting the waves.

Now, I don’t know if Kamila Joanna is an avid surfer or if the photographer just thought she looked great posing nude with a surfboard, but it’s a win-win as far as I’m concerned. She’s naked, she’s hot, and she’s doing more for the surfboard industry than anyone since Gary Busey, William Katt, and Jan-Michael Vincent made that surfing movie in the late 70s.

If I owned a surf shop, I’d hang these pictures on the wall of my store, inviting everyone to look at and see the beauty that is Kamila Joanna posing nude with a surfboard. Certainly everyone will want to own one in hopes that they too might get Kamila Joanna to pose with it. It’d be a boon for the industry, I tells ya!

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Valmont Barcelona Bridal Fashion Week Will Have Everyone Wanting to Bang the Bride

There’s a line every bride needs to walk on their wedding day between fashionable and sexy. No one wants their family members aroused by the bride, especially on the day she’s joining someone in your family in matrimony. However, there are those brides who want to really say to the world, “It’s my wedding day, here are my tits!”

The Valmont Barcelona Bridal Fashion Week was full of dresses guaranteed to stir up feelings in everyone from Cousin Ira to Uncle Yonk. These gorgeous models were strutting the runways with all manner of sexy bridal gowns on, the kind that you might be inclined to see on a woman featured on Bridezillas.

I think it’s safe to say we won’t see many dresses on many brides in this country that expose their nipples, but I suppose Bridal Fashion Week is as good a time as any to dream about such a world. Also, the fashion week thing is getting out of hand. There are only so many god damned weeks in a year, and this marks the second fashion week I’ve heard about in this week alone. Get it together, fashion industry, you guys need a week off or something.

Photos courtesy of Getty Images

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Sofi Ka is a Naked Beach Goddess, She’s Quite Flexible Too

Sofi Ka has one of those names that looks like it might have been one name at one point in time and then she split them up. I’m sure there’s some woman somewhere with the named Sofika, there has to be. But in the meantime, we’ll go with Sofi Ka as that’s the name she’s given us and that’s the name we’re going to have to get used to.

Sofi Ka hit the beach recently for this stunning photo spread, which is causing plenty of tingly feelings below the belt, if you catch my drift. Yes, I realize I should get that checked out, but there’s really no cause for concern. I think Sofi Ka and her flexible naked body is the cause of these tingly feelings. That or that old French whore I slept with last week.

But in this case, I think it’s a matter of Sofi Ka and her numerous charms causing me to feel, inflated, so to speak. It’s like my grandmother always said, the best women are the ones who can inflate more than just your ego. She was a liberated woman, just like Sofi Ka. She’s the kind of gal you could take home to grandma. Just not my grandma, she’d probably steal her away from me.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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São Paulo Fashion Week Brings All the Hotties to Someone’s Backyard

I have no doubt in my math skills, therefore I’m comfortable in saying that there are far too many “Fashion Weeks” happening in a calendar year. Fashion Week used to be a one week affair, now it’s Fashion Week in a different city every week. Sometimes in two or three cities at once. By last count there were 61 “Fashion Weeks” last year, meaning that there were roughly nine weeks when there was more than one Fashion Week happening.

The most recent Fashion Week was in São Paulo, Brazil and it looked like it was being held in someone’s backyard. It’s a really nice backyard, don’t mistake me, it just still looks like it was definitely someone’s backyard. Are they hard up for venues in São Paulo or are they stretching by referring to this as an official Fashion Week? Something tells me the truth is closer to the latter than it is the former.

One thing you can’t deny is that there were plenty of hot models strutting their stuff and showing off their bodies in the latest fashions. I suppose women this high class wouldn’t turn up for an unsanctioned Fashion Week. I’m still not convinced, however.

Photos courtesy of Alexandre Schneider/Getty Images

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Time 100 Gala Brings Out the Hotties from Emilia Clarke to Brie Larson

This year’s annual Time 100 list of the most influential people in the world is also the 20th anniversary of the list, meaning that there were a lot of big names in attendance at this year’s gala held last night at Lincoln Center in New York City. It was a veritable who’s who of who’s influential, and that meant there were a lot of hot women there.

Kicking things off is Game of Thrones star Emilia Clarke, who is flying high on all the hype surrounding Game of Thrones‘ final season. She was looking resplendent in red and definitely outshone several of the women she posed for pictures with. Speaking of flying high, Captain Marvel herself, Brie Larson, was also there just 24 hours after the Avengers: Endgame premiere. She works hard for her money, so you’d better treat her right.

The real scene stealer last night, however, was Indya Moore, star of the hit series Pose, who was posing in a completely see-through dress that nicely showed off her nipples! She had plenty of stiff competition from such hotties as Petra Nemcova, Alex Morgan, Sophia Bush, Taylor Swift, and even the legendary model Helena Christensen, but if we had to pick a winner, it’d by Indya. Who’s your favorite Time 100 hottie? Sound off in the usual place!

Photos courtesy of Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

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‘Tattooed Beauties’ Will Make You Want to Buy a Book Again

When’s the last time you bought a book and read it cover to cover? If it’s been as long as I suspect, it’s time to consider making your first book purchase in quite some time thanks to Goliath’s new amazing photography book Tattooed Beauties.

Masterfully produced by fashion and tattoo star photographer Christian Saint, across 250 high-quality printed pages you will see over 50 great-looking tattoo beauties, including Kelly Eden, Bonnie Rotten, Abbey So, Riae, Maegan Machine, Fallon Ven Detta, Alesandra Nicole, Emily Shephard, Cleo Wattenström, Kayte Rae, Annasthesia Awful, Bambu Jessica, Dani Vi, Gabriella Saturria, Linette Otero, Hayley G, Vanessa Lake, Jennifer Lynn, Jesse Lee D, Jessica Wilde, Kay Reynolds, Leila Rose, Leza Lush, Linnea Thomasia, Phay Moss, and Sarah Jensen. Also included are loads of exciting top tattoos, all super erotic and fantastically photographed.

The book has 256 pages total and 250 photos, so you do the math on how much “reading” you’ll have to do once you purchase this book. The perfect display piece for any tattoo aficionado or just anyone that loves the beauty of a naked woman, Tattooed Beauties is the perfect summer read!

Click here to order your copy of Tattooed Beauties today!

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All photos courtesy of Goliath Books

 

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Flora Garai’s Got a Snake, Mang, Let Her Charm Yours

You guys remember that old chestnut, “I got a snake, mang,” right? Well, Flora Garai’s got a snake too, mang, and she’s definitely at ease with the creatures of the night as you can tell from this amazing new Playboy spread. Flora’s the kind of chick who doesn’t mind getting fully nude in the company of snakes and owls, so she’s got to be a real creature of the night herself.

I wonder if this is some sort of confession on Flora Garai’s part to her being a nocturnal being. It’s possible that some humans are nocturnal, and I think Flora Garai might be one of them. Why bother with the day time if all it’s going to do is net you a bunch of pals who are asleep? Better to hang with those of your own kind, creatures that love coming out at night, like Flora Garai and owls and snakes.

She could also be a latent pet detective of some sort and this is her way of communing with nature. There’s a lot of different ways to read this nude spread from Flora Garai, but I think the most important takeaway here is that she looks spectacular naked. All the rest is just guesswork.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Julianne Hough and Rachel McCord Hit the Town in Toight Pants

What do you call pants when they’re tighter than tight? I think the only way to describe truly tight pants is to use the Goldmember pronunciation to say that Julianne Hough and Rachel McCord are both wearing some very toight pants! Toight like a toiger!

I don’t know if Julianne Hough and Rachel McCord know one another or if they’re completely ignorant to the other’s existence, but they’ve definitely got a similar fashion sense. Start with some super toight pants and work backwards from there. It’s a winning formula, as you can tell from the insanely toight pants that both Julianne Hough and Rachel McCord are wearing.

I wouldn’t recommend just anyone start wearing toight pants though. It’s the kind of thing that only a select few can pull off. I would comfortably say that Julianne Hough and Rachel McCord can both pull off the toight pants look, but they’ve both got amazing bodies. Who do you think has the better body? Who’s rocking the toight pants better? Julianne Hough or Rachel McCord? Sound off in the comments section below!

Photos courtesy of Getty Images

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Sera Mann is All Woman, As You Can See When You Check Out Her Naked Body

Don’t be fooled by her last name, Sera Mann is all woman. If you have your doubts about that, I would advise you to behold the amazing pictures in the gallery below and see your petty argument struck down in a ball of flame. She’s a woman who enjoys doing any number of things, so long as she gets to be naked while she does them. That’s the Sera Mann way.

Honestly, the only real bummer here is that there are only nine pictures of Sera Mann’s stunning self for us to enjoy. It feels like there could have been a hundred times that number and it still would’ve been too few pictures. I feel like all nine of these pics are perfection, though, so it’s always good to raise the average, so to speak, by having fewer pictures.

I just don’t think there’s such a thing as having “too many” naked pictures of Sera Mann. I don’t think there’s any point on sitting on any pictures of her, even if she’s blinking or pulling a stupid face in some of them. Having only nine pictures makes me wonder where all the rest are. I get it, good problem to have, but a problem nonetheless.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Boob Tube Roundup: The Week’s Sexiest TV Scenes 4.22.19

Over at MrSkin.com, they don’t just focus on the week’s best nude scenes. They also round up all of the sexy non-nude content from the week and we’re bringing it to you in our Boob Tube Roundup! Here’s what you’ll find in the gallery below…

Now Apocalypse: Kelli Berglund strips out of her jumper, showing off her amazing ass in a thong!

The ActJoey King and Calum Worthy are on the lam, laying low in a motel and having lots of sex. She tries on a sexy bra and her rainbow wig.

Proven InnocentRachelle Lefevre and Candice Coke share a steamy make out session in the shower.

Grey’s AnatomyCaterina Scorsone shows some cleavage in bed after having sex with a guy.

American GodsLaura Bell Bundy performs a cowgirl burlesque routine in an American flag corset and panties, and we get some nice close ups as she dances around the stage.

Bosch: Jamie Ann Allman is wearing a matching bra and undies as she is helped up by the title hero

Huge in France: This French Netflix comedy about comedian Gad Elmaleh had lots of sexy ladies showing off in the first season. Rebecca Azan rocks an arm bra over her huge breasts, Erinn Hayes shows plenty of cleavage bending over for Gad, and Brittany Ross showed some poolside bikini cleavage!

Homecoming: A Film by Beyoncé: Beyoncé shows off in a thong while doing a long lunge during a performance in her Netflix documentary.

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Brittany Snow, Kara Del Toro, and More Heat Up the Netflix Red Carpet

In case you were under the impression that Netflix wasn’t positively drowning in new content, allow me to introduce the creators and stars of the new Netflix Original Comedy Film Someone Great, starring Gina Rodriguez and Brittany Snow. They were just two of the stars in attendance at the film’s premiere—it’s streaming on the service as of today—and if the red carpet festivities are any indication, it’s gonna have more sexy women per square foot than any other movie premiering on Netflix today.

Kicking off our gallery is the smoking hot Kara Del Toro, who isn’t in the film, but who adds some much needed smolder to the red carpet premiere. Up next is the gorgeous Brittany Snow, who was showing plenty of cleavage and rocking a flowery jumper. She’s Gotta Have It star DeWanda Wise was also looking smoking hot, with her pink headband adding an appropriate splash of color.

Gina Rodriguez was making the most of her dress’ long train, and she made it work as best she could—seriously ladies, the trains are getting out of control. Also on hand were such luminaries of the hottie world as Katherine McNamara, Sugar Lyn Beard, and Yara Martinez!

Photos courtesy of Getty Images

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Fall in Lova with Anastasiya Avilova and Her Perfect Nude Body

What’s not to love about a woman like Anastasiya Avilova? If you said nothing, you’re absolutely right, because there is everything to love about Anastasiya Avilova, starting and ending with her stunningly perfect nude body. I think that the world would be a better place if more people stopped what they were doing and spent some time drinking in the delights Anastasiya Avilova has to offer.

Like many women from Eastern Europe, Anastasiya Avilova has an abundance of “A”s in her name, which is a signature trait of many women from the same area. The leg up that Anastasiya Avilova has on the competition is that she’s posing nude in Playboy, which gives her all the visibility she needs to rise above the rest. It’s a tough climb, but methinks Anastasiya Avilova is up to the task.

Anastasiya Avilova may not have been your dream girl when you woke up this morning, but I’m willing to bet that when you lay your head on the pillow tonight, Anastasiya Avilova will be the last thing running through your mind. I mean, girls like Anastasiya Avilova don’t come along every day, so spend your last waking moments today giving Anastasiya Avilova a place in your thoughts.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Olivia Wilde Adds Some Sex Appeal to Premiere of Her Directorial Debut ‘Booksmart’

One of the best things to come out of the MeToo movement has been the number of female directors that have been able to get their films made. Olivia Wilde is the latest gorgeous actress to move behind the camera with her directorial debut Booksmart looking like a girls version of Superbad—even stranger considering one of the female leads is Jonah Hill’s sister Beanie Feldstein.

Olivia and her two stars, Feldstein and Kaitlyn Dever, were looking good at the film’s premiere, showing off their thousand watt smiles and getting us giddy to see what big laughs they have in store for us with this new film. Can I also say that Kaitlyn Dever is turning into quite an incredible actress. Sure she was always fine on Last Man Standing, but seeing her come into her own over the last few years in flicks like Short Term 12, Detroit, and Beautiful Boy has given me a much better appreciation for her talents.

I’m very much looking forward to seeing Olivia’s directorial debut, and I’m also looking forward to her getting back in front of the camera again sometime soon. If she wants to go nude, that’s great, but it’s always a treat to see her. Clothed or otherwise.

Photos courtesy of MEGA

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Playboy Model Ana Maria is Forlorn, Fully Nude

I don’t know why Ana Maria looks so sad and detached in this new photo set from Playboy, but there’s something melancholy running through these pictures. There’s an unmistakeable air of sadness that permeates her every look. Is she missing someone? Is she thinking of times gone by? Who can tell for sure?

Part of me thinks that Ana Maria was promised a pony ride and when the photographer showed up without the pony, she just became very withdrawn and forlorn. It’s hard to get your hopes up and then see those hopes dashed, and Ana Maria has that dejected look of someone who was promised a pony ride only to find out that dad spent all his money on Cutty Sark. Again.

I know what might Ana Maria in a better mood? Get her a damn pony ride already, Playboy. You guys have got to know some sort of black market animal dealers somewhere, get on the phone, make a few calls, and get this gorgeous woman the god damned pony ride she was promised. It’s literally the least you can do at this point, considering how much Ana Maria has given us in return.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Don’t Go Chasing Waterfalls, Chase a Nude Bella Chase Instead

Like so many Playboy models, Bella Chase’s name is likely fictitious, but it doesn’t make the direction in her last name any less meaningful. There is a chase afoot everyday in Bella Chase’s life as men metaphorically and literally chase her to the ends of the earth. It may not be the most futile quest anyone’s ever undertaken, but you’d be hard pressed to say it’s not a noble quest.

Bella Chase also sounds like the name of someone obsessed with garbage pop culture. Did she take her first name from the heroine of Twilight and her surname from the hero of Entourage? I don’t know, but I wouldn’t be surprised since those are both overwhelmingly popular pop culture characters and the nostalgia people feel for them both is palpable. Part of me thinks this is possible, but the logical part of me says that she probably just wanted a last name that made you think of always being in pursuit of Bella Chase.

And so the Chase is on. The Chase for Bella Chase. That sounds like a charity event people might actually show up for. We really need to raise awareness and get people on board for all of this as quickly as possible.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Barbara Palvin Makes Pajamas Sexy Again

Let’s make one thing abundantly clear: there’s nothing sexy about pajamas. Along with long johns and leisure suits, they are, historically, among the most unsexy articles of clothing ever created. However, taking one look at Victoria’s Secret Angel Barbara Palvin in her sexy, silky, red pajamas might just convince you that your grandpa’s favorite bedtime clothes can be sexy under the right circumstances.

Wearing pajamas to bed, to me, feels a bit like wearing a business suit to bed. It’s formal for no good god damned reason. Sure, if you’re sleeping over at someone’s house for the first time or are a germophobe staying in a cut-rate hotel, pajamas might cut it, but there are so few good reasons to wear pajamas that it almost seems like they should’ve gone extinct long ago.

Barbara Palvin, on the other hand, has almost single handedly rescued pajamas from extinction. Seriously, if we could get more hot women in more hot pajamas like these, I might be persuaded to change my entire opinion on the sleepwear. Until then, we’ll just have to consider Barbara Palvin and her sexy pajamas the exception that proves the rule. Good luck changing hearts and minds, Barbara Palvin. If anyone can do it, it would be you!

Photos courtesy of MEGA

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Explore Your Fringe Benefits Package with Naked HR Rep Megan Blake

If you’ve ever worked in corporate America, you know that there’s nothing worse than a meeting about your benefits package with your HR representative. That’s what makes Megan Blake so much better than the average HR rep, because when she’s got a list of things to let you know about, she’s going to strip down to nothing while informing you of your rights and benefits as a part of the company.

Now, I don’t know what company Megan Blake works for, and it may well be Playboy, but the name of this photo set was “Fringe Benefits” which makes my corrupted mind harken back to my years spent in the corporate world. Using buzzwords like “best practices” and “low hanging fruit” was arguably the worst period of my entire life, but I really think things could have been improved had a single one of my HR reps looked or behaved anything like Megan Blake.

So the next time you’re called into an hour long meeting that easily could have been an e-mail, sneak in these pictures of Megan Blake. At least it’ll give you something productive to do while the meeting’s going on. That’s more than anyone else has ever done for your sanity in these situations.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Olivia Culpo, Peyton List, and More Bring Sexy Back to Revolve Festival

I couldn’t begin to tell you what Revolve Festival is or who it concerns or what it’s all about, but I can tell you for sure that Revolve Festival was jam packed with some of the hottest hotties in one are in quite some time. From Olivia Culpo to Peyton List, this was the place to see and be seen and be ogled and be watched and be stalked and be haunted until the day you die.

First up, Olivia Culpo is bringing back jhorts in a big way, doing more in one afternoon for the maligned leg wear than Kevin Smith has in the last decade! Thank goodness she decided not to wear a hockey jersey. Disney star Peyton List was wearing an outfit that was both painfully sexy and admirably matched, with a nude tone complimenting her body quite nicely!

The sexy Draya Michele was showing off beaucoup cleavage in a sexy bikini top, while sexy pals Madison Reed and Victoria Justice took a spin on the carousel. That’s gotta be doing something for somebody. Closing things out are the magnificent midriff of Jasmine Sanders, and the always sexy antics of Stella Maxwell! It looks like a fun time was had by all, now I just need someone to tell me what in the hell Revolve Festival is. Anyone?

Photos courtesy of Getty Images

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Boob Tube Roundup: The Week’s Sexiest TV Scenes 4.15.19

Over at MrSkin.com, they don’t just focus on the week’s best nude scenes. They also round up all of the sexy non-nude content from the week and we’re bringing it to you in our Boob Tube Roundup! Here’s what you’ll find in the gallery below…

SpecialPunam Patel attends a pool party full of beautiful people, including Kat Rogers and Samantha Lee. The three girls chat poolside in bikinis and a one piece showing some skin!

Diablo Guardián: Series star Paulina Gaitán was looking sexy as hell in the second season of this Amazon Original, and in the third episode, Johanna Murillo lays nude but strategically covered after sex with a guy!

Happy!: Screen legend Ann-Margret guests stars in this week’s episode as an old Hollywood starlet. She shows some prominent left pokie when she answers the door to greet Christopher Meloni!

The Act: Joey King sits in front of the computer in her bra as she role plays with her boyfriend. Later, they finally meet in person where they have sex in the bathroom at the movie theater!

Now Apocalypse: Kelli Berglund kept her clothes on this week, but didn’t mind showing plenty of skin regardless!

Tijuana: This new Mexican Netflix series served up the sexy Valentina Acosta in her bra, along with Abril Schreiber showing some pokies in a sheer tank top!

The Bold Type: Brunette beauty Katie Stevens looked supremely sexy in a black bra and matching undies!

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Photos courtesy of MrSkin.com

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Kate Great Lives Up to Her Name with an Exquisite Nude Body

It takes balls to use the last name Great, unless it’s your real last name, which doesn’t seem terribly likely in the case of Playboy model Kate Great. It seems like a moniker she came up with on the spot as she sat and reflected on what she looked like nude, determining that Great was the only adjective worth turning into a last name.

I’m sure the rhyming with her first name element of it really helped to seal the deal, but then again, it’s probably a chicken and the egg type of deal. Did Kate Great come up with Kate and work backwards from there, or was Great there first and then she needed a first name that rhymed? We’ll probably never know as women aren’t usually in the habit of divulging the etymology of their fake names.

It’ll be super easy to remember Kate Great’s name once you take a good long look at her nude hanging around the house. You’ll never hear the word Great ever again without thinking Kate Great, probably, which is a good problem to have if you ask me. If I’m going to associate any word with any person, it’s better if they’re a naked woman.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Carla Howe Hits the Town With Busty Friend

One of the most fun things about being a busty celebrity has to be finding other busty people to hang out with. Carla Howe knows this better than anyone as her friend is clearly every bit her equal in the busty department, and the two hit the town to show off their breasts for the assembled paparazzo.

Another thing I didn’t know until right this moment is that Carla Howe has a twin sister. Did you guys know this? I’m sure you did because you’re always much more up to date on the latest trends than me, but this is like big time news to me. Do the Howe sisters ever get frisky together, you think? Are they ever like, “Let’s go out and show our tits to the cameramen?” I’m willing to bet that conversation has happened more than once, including right before these pictures were taken.

So cheers to Carla Howe on being a twin, having a busty friend, and leaving the house without a bra. She hit the trifecta in my book and she’s earned the right to take the rest of the day off. Enjoy some r and r, Carla, you’ve earned it just by being your busty, beautiful self!

Photos courtesy of MEGA

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Scarlett Johansson Brings Some Peekaboo Cleavage to ‘Avengers: Endgame’ UK Fan Event

The hype for Avengers: Endgame is reaching critical mass this week as the film’s stars have been making the promotional rounds, despite the film not being released until two weeks from tonight. Scarlett Johansson, who plays Black Widow in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, attended a UK fan event yesterday in London alongside fellow MCU-ers Paul Rudd and Chris Hemsworth, as well as Endgame directors Joe and Anthony Russo.

The dress that Scarlett picked for the occasion is gorgeously designed to accentuate her cleavage by basically removing most of the fabric that would have normally surrounded them on a dress. It’s a bold fashion statement, but one that Scarlett Johansson manages to pull off with aplomb. Seriously though, she could show up in a burlap sack and make it sexy.

I hope that this becomes the de facto dress design for Scarlett Johansson from here on out. It would be amazing and sexy of her to show up everywhere in this style of dress. I mean, it’s not like we’re ever going to get tired of look at Scarlett Johansson’s cleavage, right? So let’s just see if we can get her more dresses designed exactly like this one.

Photos courtesy of Getty Images

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Often I Think of Hailey Afton and Her Amazing Nude Body

I don’t know much about Hailey Afton, other than her last name sounds like a combination of After and Often. I don’t know if that’s what her ancestors were going for with that last name, but I think they’d be proud to know that their genes are alive and well in the form of the gorgeous—and gorgeously nude—Hailey Afton.

We all think about our legacy and what will come of our bloodline when it no longer courses through our veins. I think I’d be quite content to know that, hundreds of years from now, some progeny of mine is as beautiful as Hailey Afton, particularly when she’s nude, lounging around the house, and flaunting her perfect body.

I don’t think we’d want our descendants doing much more than that, after all, it can get quite tiring repressing all of those hunter gatherer instincts. Better to stay inside, nude, like Hailey Afton. She’d be making her ancestors proud if they could see her now. Hell, they’d probably pleasure themselves to her. They are cavemen, after all, and we don’t expect much more than that from cavemen.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Zara Holland’s Red Hot Bikini Cleavage Will Knock Your Wooden Shoes Off

As someone consistently out of the loop, I’ve never seen a second of Love Island, but my sources tell me that busty babe Zara Holland here is one of the stars of that British reality series. Well, I don’t know if they shoot on Barbados or if that is indeed the titular amorous isle, but these pictures were taken on Barbados meaning that Zara Holland is one babe who just can’t get enough of the beach.

I know that Zara Holland has nothing to do with Holland itself, but I think she’d be right at home in the land of windmills, tulips, and of course, those fashionable wooden shoes. I don’t know how people get anywhere in Holland wearing wooden shoes. They don’t look particularly comfortable, and what’s more, they’re not even remotely practical. Try sneaking up on someone in wooden shoes.

Anyway, Zara Holland’s hotness is sure to knock the wooden shoes off many a Dutchman today, and that’s just how it should be. Gotta keep those fuckers on their toes, you never know what they’re up to. Unless they’re sneaking up on you, then you can hear them from a mile away.

Photos courtesy of MEGA

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I’m Looking Over a Nude Katya Clover

If you were raised in an Irish household, you’ve no doubt heard the upbeat tune “I’m Looking Over a Four Leaf Clover.” It’s an old standby and one that your Irish grandmother was sure to croon whenever good news was on the horizon—which, if you were raised in an Irish household—was next to never.

Well, even if you’re not familiar, there’s no reason that you can’t look over a nude Katya Clover, a new and nude model for Playboy that loves the beach and, more importantly, loves getting naked at the beach. There aren’t many nude beaches here in the States, so I imagine they went somewhere where the laws—and morals—are a bit looser.

There’s plenty to admire as you look over Katya Clover, from her incredibly tight body to her love of ridding herself of every scrap of body hair. Sure, it makes her look a bit like a sex doll below the waist, but isn’t that what society has taught us to desire? I don’t even know anymore, it’s so hard to keep up with the trends. Damn kids.

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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The Second “N” in Katherinne Sofia’s Name Stands for “Naked”

I wonder if it’s more difficult for women to come up with a pseudonym in this day and age because so many have been taken over the years. I imagine it’s to the point now where women are resorting to the tactics at play in Katherinne Sofia’s name and just adding an extra consonant where one doesn’t belong.

It’s not unlike the predicament faced by younger baseball players, particularly those coming up in organizations like the Red Sox, Yankees, and Cardinals where numbers that aren’t retired or associated with a legendary player are harder and harder to come by. Likewise, Katherine Sofia just won’t cut it in 2019, so she had to be Katherinne Sofia.

I wonder why she didn’t go with two Fs in her last name though. I mean, shit, you’re already most of the way there, why not just take it all the way home. Katherrrrrinnnnne Sofffffffeeeeyuh. Or something, I don’t know, it just seems like if you’re going to add an extra “n” you might as well just add extra everything. Soon even Jane Does will turn into Janne Ddoes because there’s just no way to distinguish between people anymore. Anywho, Katherinne’s extra “n” might as well stand for naked, because she does look spectacular!

Photos courtesy of Playboy Plus

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Maria Pedraza Nips Out and Jumps for Joy at Malaga Film Festival

I’ve heard of people jumping for joy, but Spanish siren Maria Pedraza is taking it to a whole new level at the Malaga Film Festival in Spain! The 23 year old beauty was at the festival in support of her new film ¿A quién te llevarías a una isla desierta?, or Who Would You Take to a Desert Island?, set to premiere next month on Netflix.

After seeing Maria’s magnificent hard nipples in this brilliant blue top, I think I would definitely consider taking Maria Pedraza with me to a desert island. I mean, it’s a very long list of candidates, and I might be suffering from a serious case of recency bias, but I think that Maria Pedraza would be a great choice to bring along to a desert island. All that jumping, not to mention her dance background, would really come in handy when we’re trying to round up coconuts.

Granted, I probably never have to worry about being stranded on a desert island somewhere, but if I am, I’m glad to know that I’ve got Maria Pedraza as an option to bring with me. This girl knows how to have a good time wherever she is, even on a desert island.

Photos courtesy of Getty Images

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