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Meet the Site Turning Amateur Girls’ Sexual Fantasies into Reality…Plus a Killer Discount!

Porn, and discounts. Are these the two greatest things in life? If the answer is yes (and why the hell wouldn’t it be), then we have just the thing for you. First, The Discount. 50% off your membership for the site Ersties.com. That’s half price for a Porn site filled with thousands of videos, thousands of Pictures, new updates 3 times a week, and a unique and damn fine Porn Experience. Now, for the site.

Ersties.com is a site dedicated, in their own words, ‘to showcasing authentic amateurs in unique and natural settings.’ What does that actually mean? Well, it means they don’t do fake porn bullshit. You won’t be finding Babysitting Daddy lovers on Ersties. Instead, you’ll find genuine amateurs, fucking at home, fucking with friends, fucking in public. You’ll find multiple updates each and every week, full picture sets of every shoot and every model, all available in HD. Girls solo, girls together, girls with their guys, and, our favorite, their incredible, and very frequent, Orgy Shoots.

What really caught our eye as we conducted our ‘research’ (hey, it’s a tough job but someone’s gotta do it) was their more ‘special’ shoots. The Ersties Sexual Fantasy Series is the most simple, yet genius concept for porn we’ve ever heard. They invite amateur girls from around the world to email in their sexual fantasies, and then, Ersties make them happen! Which is how you end up with hot as hell Lucy, dressed up as Queen with her own army of sex slaves, submitting to her every sexual wish (Click here to watch). Or how Sicilia receives a BDSM coach named Katana to teach her how to dominate a man.

Then there is their First Sex series, which, as the name suggests, is all about capturing first time experiences between two people. How they get to that point is where the fun comes into it. Recreating The Dating Game, one hot girl asking 3 horny guys the most ridiculous questions, all behind a wall without seeing each other. Then picking her favorite …and fucking them as soon as they meet. That’s Ersties, unique and fun, but with incredible sex at the end of it all!

In summary, if you’re looking for a truly unique porn site, Ersties.com is the one for you. And what better excuse to give it a go, than with 50% off the price. Click here and claim yours now.

The post Meet the Site Turning Amateur Girls’ Sexual Fantasies into Reality…Plus a Killer Discount! appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.

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Tinashe Showcases Her Sexy Flat Stomach Out In West Hollywood

As a self-proclaimed expert in self-protection, I cannot emphasize strongly enough how a poor a choice it is to use a giant red bag to carry your valuables in. Tinashe is basically yelling a challenge to everyone in the vicinity to come and snatch it from her. It is like a matador shaking his cape. I understand that she has the fit body of a dancer, but I doubt she can throw enough high kicks around to knock out every attacker on the block.

I recommend not even using a purse to carry your belongings around. A brown paper bag serves well enough to do the job, plus it’s better for the environment. The only downside is that someone might steal the paper bag thinking it contains delicious groceries. You can avoid that by writing “Health Food Store” on the outside of it.

Personally, I carry around my belongings in a dog poop bag. Only the most perverted of people would think to steal that from a person’s hands. The only downside to this option is that occasionally a store clerk will refuse to take my money because they saw me remove it from the bag. Even me trying to force them to smell the dollar doesn’t do any good.

 

 

 

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

The post Tinashe Showcases Her Sexy Flat Stomach Out In West Hollywood appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.

Anna Heinrich’s Gorgeous Bikini Body Candids

Anna Heinrich is the best booty to wash ashore since Blackbeard’s pirate plunder. She’s arguably more valuable too. I wouldn’t want to bury something so beautiful in the sand. I’d just show her off like the gold coin she is. I hope she wouldn’t mind me sticking my shovel in her pail. Because I want to build this sand queen a sand castle. She deserves something elaborate in her honor. I’m thinking, at the minimum, a four story castle. Maybe a balcony for a view of the ocean. And if she doesn’t want a castle, I’ll just build myself one with a view of her.

Anna may be the best looking woman in a black bikini that I’ve ever seen. And I’ve only seen one woman in a black bikini. And it’s her. So she wins best looking by default. But Heinrich is going to be hard to beat if anyone else decides to wear one. I’m not discouraging any woman from wearing one as I wouldn’t mind getting a good gander at both ladies for comparison purposes. I’m just saying she’s going to be harder to outdo than the ’98 Yankees.

Photo Credit: MEGA / Backgrid USA 

The post Anna Heinrich’s Gorgeous Bikini Body Candids appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.

Glenn Close Wants Everyone to Know She’s Horny

I feel like the worst thing about the internet is that someone decided we should have the ability to let people comment on porn. Have you ever read the comments when a porn star or amatuer porn star posts to social media? It’s a desert of pure thirst. And I get it, we all want to have sex with Bailey Jay, but I doubt posting “I’d love to suck those tits” under a picture she posted on Twitter is going to make that happen. I’m guilty of this myself; you might think that because I talk about thirsty I am for Kristen Stewart for comedic effect it’s not true, but it is, it is very true.

I had hoped, however, that our most cherished actors and actresses would at least not tell us how horny they are in interviews, but Glenn Close has decided we all need to know her vagina is still open for business in an interview in The Guardian.

Right now, she believes she is in her prime. “I feel as free and as creative, as sexual and as eager, as I ever have. And it’s ironic because I’m thinking: ‘How much time do I have left now?’ There are so many things I’m interested in doing. It’s one of those ironies, I suppose, that we sometimes start feeling comfortable in our own skin only late in our lives, but hopefully with enough time to benefit from it. I’m so glad to do what I do because even though I’m not a method actor and I don’t use my life in my acting, my work is still a progression. So what comes after this I’m excited to see. Right now, I’m just enjoying feeling …” She searches for the word, then giggles to herself. “Chuffed. Isn’t that what you all say? I’m feeling very chuffed.”

Close got on the topic of sex because she was talking about the sex scene she filmed in her new film, The Wife.

How refreshing to find her sexuality undimmed in The Wife. The opening sex scene between her and Pryce was the first thing they shot. “We arrived on set in our jammies,” she chuckles. “We were both thinking the same thing: ‘We’re pros, we’ve been doing this a long time. Let’s just get down to it.’” It feels revolutionary to see two actors in their 70s having drowsy, vocal, pleasurably filthy sex together. “I know,” she whoops.

If this is what people mean when they say “political correctness has gone too far” then I’m onboard. I don’t find the site of old people having sex to be “refreshing.” I mean, good for them, but I would like to sign up to not see that. Also, PornHub is full of old people sex if you need to feel “refreshed.”

The post Glenn Close Wants Everyone to Know She’s Horny appeared first on The Blemish.

Mary J Blige Definitely Still Got It In Truly Wild Bikini Pics

What we are looking at is a body that has been on this earth for close to fifty years, at least that is what they want us to believe. I have my own theories regarding that, which involve nosferatu, but until I gather more evidence I am forced to keep them to myself for legal reasons. But until the day comes that I have my smoking gun, I will appreciate the sight along with the rest of you.

What I like to see in these photos is that Mary J. Blige puts safety first at all times. So many people have been lost at sea, and yet we still pretend like it is all fun and games out there. But not Mary. When that boat is in motion she has her butt firmly planted in her seat, or else she has both hands holding onto something. Did you think she was hugging that person our of affection? Hell, no. That hug shows the person that if Mary is going overboard then so are they.

And what does Mary do when she has to walk down stairs without a railing? She puts her back against the wall and feels her way down, like a blind person. That is very smart, because who knows how much she was drinking.

 

 

 

Photo Credit: Instagram / MEGA / Getty Image 

The post Mary J Blige Definitely Still Got It In Truly Wild Bikini Pics appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.

Most Obvious Study Ever Shows People More Likely to Bone in Driverless Cars

Any guy who’s ever taken a road trip with an adventurous partner knows that it’s entirely possible to get oral sex while driving a car. Unfortunately for the ladies there just isn’t enough room to get in there in a similar way, but your problems could be coming to an end with driverless cars. Considering people have been fucking in every private space they could find since the first man to stand upright dragged Raquel Welch back to his cave, we probably didn’t need a study to tell us people were fucking in driverless cars, but we got one anyway.

If your question is “What are people doing with this new piece of technology?” the answer is always going to be “Finding a way to have an orgasm.” This has been true of every invention in the history of mankind. Don’t believe me? Our first inventions were, arguably, fire and the wheel. I have an ex-girlfriend who got off on having candle wax dripped on her and without the wheel, vibrators wouldn’t vibrate. Fire and the wheels also happen to be the things that make driverless cars go so people can have sex in them. Everything we’ve ever invented we’ve used to give ourselves orgasms.

So when will we be able to tool around town in our autonomous pussy wagons? The study’s lead researcher, Scott Cohen, told Fast Company it’s just around the corner, relatively speaking.

Given the data that’s currently available on sex, cars, and automation, the only lingering question seems to be not if AV sex will take place, but when. “The 2040s,” says Cohen, without hesitation, when I ask. “The whole discussion of AVs being mainstream, and a dominant form of automobile transport–that’s [predicted for] the 2040s. But if we think this through in the moment, a mobile red light district doesn’t require all the cars around it, or a majority of cars around it, to be autonomous . . . There’s no reason it couldn’t happen earlier.”

We were supposed to have flying cars by now, too, so I’m not holding my breath, but if I had to choose things to do in my car, I’d rank sex higher than flying anyway.

The post Most Obvious Study Ever Shows People More Likely to Bone in Driverless Cars appeared first on The Blemish.

World’s Luckiest Man Dies in Seventh Round of Sex Competition

A man died in a sex competition in Nigeria. This is a thing that really happened. I know you’re saying that it sounds fake but it was reported by The Guardian Nigeria, and it’s not as if a storied news organization like The Guardian would just make something up out of whole cloth.

Here’s what The Guardian Nigeria reported.

A middle-aged man, simply known as Davy, has died in a popular hotel in Ikotun area of Lagos State during a sex competition with a lady identified as Loveth.

It was gathered that the late Davy had argued with Loveth on who can last longer in a sex bout.

Both claimed they were stronger and refused to admit defeat.

During the argument, Davy staked N50,000 on the condition that if Loveth defeats him during the romp, she will take the money.

Who hasn’t been there? Which one of us hasn’t said to our friend or partner or a total stranger “Hey, I think I can fuck longer than you and I’ve got $137 American to back it up!”

Well you fucked up Davy. You not only lost, you got fucked to death. Now you’re out $137 and you’re dead.

There’s even worse news, because Loveth is in jail waiting for the autopsy to verify if her “I fucked him to death” story checks out.

But the one thing we can all agree on is if we have to go, I think we’d all like to die while having our seventh consecutive orgasm.

The post World’s Luckiest Man Dies in Seventh Round of Sex Competition appeared first on The Blemish.

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Gigi Hadid’s New Cleavage Model Shots Are Sexy As Ever

If Gigi was trying to prove she is as attractive as Michelle Pfeiffer, then mission accomplished. In Scarface Michelle was wearing plunging necklines with no bra in nearly every scene. I have no criticisms in regards to Michelle’s face, the thing is damn near perfect, but her boobs leave a little bit to be wanting. And that is why I am happy to see Gigi picking up the torch.

Gigi seems to have just a bit more going on up top than Michelle did, and that little bit of mass makes a hell of a difference. Rather than being a loosey goosey top, the fabric gets pulled taut by the filling, making for a much more pleasing sight.

I do not know who made Gigi Hadid feel so self-conscious that she had to prove to everyone that she was no second fiddle to Michelle, but I thank them for their mind games. Now my advent calendar of cleavage is off to a hell of a good start. I gave up the calendars with sweets years ago because they lost their appeal, and I replaced them with more women. I hope they are one sweet I never lose a taste for.

 

 

Photo Credit: Instagram 

The post Gigi Hadid’s New Cleavage Model Shots Are Sexy As Ever appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.

Sex Kitten Elsa Hosk Wilds Out In Animal Print Thong

Elsa Hosk is an expert at knowing just how to give a man an eyeful. She should look into just looking beautiful as her profession. A full-time beauty like her should be paid and praised without having to lift a finger. I know I have at least ten fingers available with Elsa’s name on them. I can do all of her bidding while she just relaxes and continues to look like the perfect pile a sugar in a sweet bikini.

I would like to travel with Hosk. I know I can be of some help. I could carry luggage. Or her, when she’s tired of walking. I know she hasn’t brought it up, but the thing she’s missing in life is me. It’s all too obvious. I enjoy hot women. She is a hot woman. Problem solved before she even knew that not having me around was her problem. Normally I would charge for a consultation like that, but since she’s a looker, I’ll let it slide. She just has to promise not to attended any more exotic beaches without giving me a ring. We’ve spent too much time apart for too long to miss another minute together.

 

Photo Credit: Instagram 

The post Sex Kitten Elsa Hosk Wilds Out In Animal Print Thong appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.

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Carmen Valentina Flaunts Her Sandy Cheeks In Sextastic Beachside Candids

I do not know where Carmen Valentina gets the entitlement to think that she can where a bathing suit like that in a public and not be harassed, but I blame her parenting. Her father is probably a cop and her mother is likely a grizzly bear. And I’m talking about a little grizzly bear. That combo probably made it so that a teenaged Carmen was able to wear whatever she wanted with no repercussions, so long as her father was on her side and the grizzly was well trained.

I know of certain cultures that have their women wear special braces from childhood in order to elongate their necks. I think something similar happened with Carmen because there is no other rational reason for her waist to be so small in comparison to the rest of her body. She must have been wearing a XXXS corset since she was ten in order to keep that figure.

I would think that undergoing something like that would leave her core weak, but she seems to have no trouble keeping herself upright without assistance. That is more than I can say for myself, and I have never even worn a corset.

 

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

The post Carmen Valentina Flaunts Her Sandy Cheeks In Sextastic Beachside Candids appeared first on Egotastic - Sexy Celebrity Gossip and Entertainment News.

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