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Lady Gaga, Vanessa Hudgens, and All The Sexiest Stars Sharing The Elle ‘Women In Hollywood’ Red Carpet

Guys, did you know that there are Women in Hollywood? Apparently it’s true, and some of the hottest women in Hollywood were walking the red carpet for Elle’s Women in Hollywood event. What a fortuitous set of circumstances to bring such an event together.

Keira Knightley was there, looking like she just got out of the shower. Vanessa Hudgens was also there, rocking a pair of overalls that said, “I’m a farmer, but I have boobs too.” The busty Alice Eve kept her best assets hidden from view in a classic little black dress.

Charlize Theron was rocking a hot butch haircut and some major league cleavage in an androgynous little number. Chloe Grace Moretz is another women in Hollywood, making her a prime candidate for such an event. Kate Beckinsale as well in a beige and black dress that looks good enough to eat.

I’m also a big fan of Sara Sampaio’s outfit. That, to me, says I too am a Woman in Hollywood. So is Lady Gaga—wearing one of David Byrne’s old giant Talking Heads suits—and all the other sexy Women in Hollywood that populate this list. They are Women, Hear them walk the red carpet!

Photo Credit: MEGA / Backgrid USA 

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Sarah Hyland Sports Bra And Out Of This World Yoga Tights

I feel as though some women—and by some women, I mean most women—were born to wear yoga pants. I used to get so aggravated when I’d see a woman in workout clothes not working out, but I’ve softened in my advancing years and seeing Sarah Hyland walking around in a sports bra and yoga pants makes something other than anger rise in me. I’m betting you can guess what it is.

Sarah Hyland’s definitely got a body built for wearing workout clothes 24 by 7. She wears them so well, in fact, that exercise seems almost beside the point when looking at things objectively. I like the solar system yoga pants/leggings that she’s wearing too. They look like the wallpaper in my room when I was a kid. Fun times.

I’m guessing that you can spot a lot of things on Sarah Hyland’s workout pants, including Uranus. Though I guess for the joke to work, the planet would have to be called Heranus. Meh. You can see how much it concerns me that I ultimately decided against amending it.

Sarah Hyland’s pants truly are out of this world though. Alright, that’s the last one. Promise.

[Sarah’s Angriest Pharmacy Feud From TMZ]

Photo Credit: MEGA / Backgrid USA 

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Celebrate Ariana Grande’s Single Status With A Brief Tour of Her Sexiest Pics

With every new ending there’s an opportunity for a new beginning. I feel like Ariana Granda can rise from her old relationship, into a new one, hopefully with me, like some sort of Phoenix. I’ve already agreed on my end to cherish her in a way that she’s never been cherished, so I’m just waiting on a yes from her. I hope I’m qualified as official rebound material. She’s looks way too good for someone to let her get away. But I’m guessing her love is similar to slippery soap in the shower. If you don’t have that thing on a rope you’re going to drop it. I’ve brought my own rope just incase she does say yes. Metaphorical rope. I don’t want her to think I’m some creepy kidnapper. I’m more of a not so secret admirer.

I could probably write a book about all of the places I plan on taking Ariana. The moon is definitely one of them, so I’m attempting to teach myself rocket science like Elon Musk just so I can take a girl whose looks are out of this world, out of this world. A hot lady like her would feel right at home on the moon since she’s one of a kind. I’d even try to write our names inside a heart big enough that everyone can see from the Earth just how head over heels I am for Ariana.

[Check Out Their Pics of Happier Times Over Here]

Photo Credit: Instagram / Splash News / YouTube

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Olivia Munn Seriously Sexy In Sheer Red Carpet Dress

There’s nothing like have a good spokesman for a charity. I’m sure having a famous face showing up to your events and spreading the word about all the great stuff you are doing is priceless. And no doubt it’s even better when Olivia Munn shows up to your charity event looking all sexy.

Though, I can’t really think of a place where Olivia Munn could show up all sexy and it would be a bad thing. She go and get take out for everyone in the middle of the night looking all sexy and that would amazing. But I’m glad that Olivia Munn is using her sexiness to draw attention to… cancer. Okay, that’s it. I have to say that I wasn’t really paying that much attention to the cause because Olivia Munn in this dress is super sexy. Had I large sum of money I would gladly give it to any charity that could get Olivia Munn to dress up all sexy. That’s really the best way to get the finical support that all charities need.

So, good work Olivia Munn. You let everyone know that cancer is bad and we should stop and could you wear this dress again? I know celebs don’t wear things twice, but seriously Olivia Munn… you look amazing.

Photo Credit: MEGA / Backgrid USA / Splash News 

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Ana Braga Making Trouble With Ridiculous Coffee Run Underboob

If there has ever been such a thing as truth in advertising, I think Ana Braga has it figured out with her half shirt that reads “Trouble” just above the bottom half of her exposed breasts. God bless Ana Braga; Talk about a woman who lets you know exactly what’s coming your way.

I don’t think the shirt really needed the word “Trouble” scrawled across it to achieve Ana’s desired result. I think the bottom half of her breasts absolutely makes the case that she’s trouble. However, we have to consider what sort of trouble she is.

You see, there’s good trouble and bad trouble. Bad trouble will ruin your life and ensure that you never do anything again without seriously second guessing yourself. That’s the bad kind of trouble, and I don’t think that’s the sort Ana is broadcasting.

Methinks she traffics in the good kind of trouble. Fun trouble, you know? Is there such a thing for adults? Not usually. Fun trouble is almost exclusively the domain of the under 18 set, but when I see Ana Braga coming toward me with half of her breasts exposed, I immediately think, “Man, I’m in for some fun ass trouble this afternoon.”

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Weekend Bikini Roundup: Hailey Baldwin, Nicole Scherzinger, and Blanca Blanco In Skintastic Swimsuits

If it’s Monday and we’re still alive, that can mean only one thing: It’s time for the Weekend Bikini Roundup! While the freezing temperatures of fall gripped most of the U.S., there were still plenty of places to see and be seen on the beaches of the world.

Kicking things off is the newly crowned Mrs. Justin Bieber herself, Hailey Baldwin, who was rocking a teeny weeny white bikini while celebrating her first month of marital bliss. It’s a real shame that Ariana and Pete had to split and steal the spotlight away from this headline-worthy bikini.

Former Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger was out on a boat in a blue bikini that nicely showed off her phenomenal figure. Hopefully she and her cohorts didn’t get any sea sickness because that’ll put an end to your sexy time faster than you can say, “Cheese it, it’s the fuzz!”

Finally, Blanca Blanco’s not doing anything to make me not think about Street Fighter in this green bikini of hers. It’s like she’s just dropped a quarter on everyone’s favorite beast of burden, and she’s not going away until she KO’s the competition. Truth be told, I’d rather have Blanca in my corner than Blanka. She seems like more of a lover than a fighter.

Hit play on the video below and enjoy the pics!

Photo Credit: Instagram / MEGA / Backgrid USA 

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Emily Ratajkowski Braless In A Sheer Top Shows A Sexy Hint of Nipple

Emily Ratajkowski’s impression of the Pink Panther is splendid. She looks very pretty in a pale hue. If she truly is planning on becoming a sleuth, the next mystery she can solve is finding out the reason why I’m so deeply in love with a lady like her. Maybe it’s her look, or maybe it’s the way she looks at me in my daydreams. Either way, I’m open to some heartfelt interrogation by her.

If the term “fashion victim” exists, I think the term “fashion savior” should also exist. Because I was saved from another monotonous Monday after laying eyes on this lady. Eyeing Emily daily should be mandatory. I know it’s something I wish I did more often. As of right now, I’m getting an eyeful and much needed overdose of perfection in pink. Ratajkowski is one woman I can never seem to get enough of the same way I can never get enough of holiday leftovers. She looks better than a Thanksgiving turkey and Christmas ham combined. Tis’ almost the season of giving, and Emily is giving me a great feeling at the moment. It looks like Christmas came a little early this year.

[Check Out The Hottest Stuff From Emily Ratajkowski Right Here]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Nish Singh Jaipur

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Nish Singh Jaipur

Who’s Hottest Three-Way: Chantel Jeffries, Anastasia Kvitko, Lexy Panterra Sexy Celeb Battle Royale

Typically, when I think about a triple threat, I think about the worst. But on rare occasions, like this one, tripling up is actually a good thing. And when you’re talking about Lexy Panterra, Chanel Jefferies, and Anastasia Kvitko all in the same breath, I don’t mind the mention of a threat because the last thing beautiful women are is menacing. Not only is the third time a charm in this instance, but the second and first time are too. Looking at all three of these women at the same time is like looking at three winning lottery tickets. It’s rare and very appreciated.

I think there’s too many moving parts in this machine to determine which one is the hottest. Lexy’s smile is an unstoppable force that will make anyone looking at it smile as well. I know I’m grinning right now. Chantel’s seduction is similar to an immovable object. She’s so attractive that her presence lingers in any room long after she’s gone like an apparition. And Anastasia is the icing on the cake. She’s so sweet I get a sore tooth just looking at her. I’d call you crazy if you were able to pick just one from a line up that looks this good.

Photo Credit: MEGA / Backgrid USA 

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Alexis Ren Busty Little Crop Top Showcases Her Dancers Body

Sometimes I wish I lived back in the 1920s just so I could go to a speakeasy. Maybe I could smuggle hootch across the border, wear cool suits, listen to jazz in some smoky club, doesn’t that sound like fun? It sure does until you realize if you lived in the 1920s there would be no Alexis Ren.

Booze is legal, you can still wear suits, and Alexis Ren is here and now and she’s super sexy. That kind of makes it the best time to be alive. I’m not saying we don’t have our problems, there were tons of problems back in the 20s, the biggest of all is the lack of Alexis Ren and Alexis Ren related sexiness. Frankly, I can’t go more than a couple hours without getting a little Alexis Ren sexiness recharge so, imagine trying to live your whole life without it. And don’t give me that crap about “I wouldn’t be missing Alexis Ren because there was no Alexis Ren so how could you miss something you didn’t know about” blah, blah, blah. Oh, they knew about Alexis Ren back there. They all knew. They may not have a had a name for it, but it was Alexis Ren.

Alexis Ren and her oh so incredible body is stamped throughout time. People don’t know what it is they are missing, it’s just a feeling of emptiness inside, they pass it off as nothing. But it’s not nothing, it’s a lack of Alexis Ren sexiness.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Ruby Kaur Jaipur

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Ruby Kaur Jaipur

Dakota Johnson Sports Bra and Tights To Show Off Her Tight Tummy

God bless Dakota Johnson for having the generosity to not put that sweatshirt on, and to instead strut across that street putting her complete form on display. This is the kind of selflessness that we need more of in our society. Do you think I walk from the bathroom to my bedroom completely naked because I always forget to bring my change of clothes in with me? Of course not. I do it as a treat for my nosey neighbors, and I do it at great personal risk to myself. When my feet are wet after a shower the entire hallway becomes a danger zone.

And if it turns out that Dakota Johnson did not refuse to put her sweatshirt on for our sakes and instead did it because she was feeling too hot for another layer, then God bless her subpar sweat glands for not cooling her off enough. We need more sweat glands like hers in our society. Women are too cold nowadays for my liking. If it was up to me they would be allowed no sweat glands and be forced to pant like dogs in order to cool down. Lucky for them I do not have that kind of power.

 

 

Photo Credit: MEGA 

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The Hottest Arrivals At The Cosmopolitan “Women of the Year” Party

I am going to see an item-by-item list of all the grading criteria the great minds over at Cosmo use in order to select their so called women of the year. Until that day I will refuse to accept any of them as my own women of the year.

Don’t get me wrong, I am a big supporter of Cosmo’s work. They have been teaching inexperienced girls how to please their man for decades now, and that is something that the men who benefitted from those services will always be grateful for. But they cannot let those accomplishments carry them forever. And if they are accepting suggestions for a few new criteria, I will gladly lend a hand.

I say any woman who is in the running for woman of the year should be placed at the top of a building. A (stuffed animal) puppy would then be thrown from the rooftop. If the woman does not throw herself after what she thinks is the real puppy, then she is no longer a contender and she needs to be ostracized from society. If a woman does throw herself off and she survives, then she gets to move on to the next round. If she does not survive the fall, then she will be included as an honorable mention.

 

Photo Credit: Splash News 

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Jennifer Garner and All The Gorgeous Ladies At HBO’s ‘Camping’ Premiere

HBO shows always manage to attract a ton of talent, as well as a ton of tantalizing ladies who like taking off their clothes! The premiere for the latest HBO Original Series, Camping, was a great place to see some of the most gorgeous ladies bringing their talents to HBO this television season!

First up is the hilariously named Hari Nef, whom you may have seen in Assassination Nation last month, or sporting a pair of pasties during a burlesque show on Amazon’s Transparent. Then it’s the star of the show, Jennifer Garner, looking resplendent in red. She’s seriously looking like a woman who finally got her divorce papers signed and is ready to move on with her hot new life as a single mom!

Not far behind is Juliette Lewis, who was always cute but has really grown into a gorgeous woman. She’s rocking her forties well and I’m always glad to see her turn up in things. Two more former child stars, Rhiannon Wryn and Cheyenne Haynes, were also looking super cute, as was Disney Channel starlet Dianne Doan!

Of course, we close things out with Nicole Richie who looks like she had herself newly bronzed for the occasion. Come on Hanson, let’s go campin’!

Photo Credit: MEGA / Splash News 

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Claire Danes Out For A Jog Showcasing Her Hard Nipples

I am sure pushing a baby cart is a great way to add a little something extra to a workout, but I question the safety of it. If my driving record is any indication, I think running with babies would lead to a lot of infant fatalities. Someone should really do a study on this. Leaving the baby at home alone might be safer so long as it can’t walk. What’s the worst that could happen there? But there is plenty bad that can happen running on the streets with a child.

There are potholes that could shake that child’s head worse than any meth head if hit. Or say you turn a corner too sharply and flip over. I assume running with a carriage is the same as attaching a sidecar to a motorcycle so the tipping risk would get increased exponentially. Or you could collide into another baby pusher and now we have two baby casualties. It seems like a selfish risk to make just to get your cardio in for the day. Instead of only thinking about yourself, how ‘bout you make the selfless decision and stay at hoe getting fat. That’s what a truly loving parent does.

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA / MEGA 

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Blac Chyna Can’t Contain Her Curves In Bright Pink Slip

I would have never pegged Blac Chyna as the kind of girl that goes for pink, and I am not just saying that because of her first name. I mean, it does make a strong argument for me, you cannot very well have a guy named Superman not be super, right? I would even be willing to give her light blue and not knock her for false advertising. There is plenty fine China that uses that color.

Maybe she knows more about the benefits of different colors than I do. Like, dark colors help to hide the shape of a body, while lighter colors accentuate it. Maybe Blac Chyna is not trying to contain her curves at all! She is actually using her body as a moving billboard to showcase her talent.

Plenty of strip clubs do it all over the city, so I could see it being very beneficial for her as well. I doubt strip clubs would invest in something like that for so long if it did not pay off. What Chyna is missing is a website or phone number being visible. Now I don’t know how to get in contact with her.

 

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Sexy Dolls

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Sexy Dolls

Taylor Swift, Cobie Smulders, Amber Heard, and All The A-List Hotties On The 2018 AMA Red Carpet

The American Music Awards were held last night, and while I couldn’t tell you the difference between them and the Billboard Music Awards—beyond the obvious corporate sponsorship thing—I do know that they were jam packed with hotties, just like any great awards show.

Kicking things off is former Disney Channel cutie Laura Marano, showing a little tasteful cleavage in a long sleeveless gown. Speaking of Disney Channel alums, Vanessa Hudgens was looking impossibly perfect in pink, and Chantel Jeffries brought out her golden globes, despite this being the American Music Awards.

How I Met Your Mother‘s Cobie Smulders was beautiful in blue, while Dua Lipa looked like she came directly from her prom. Taylor Swift looks like a god damned disco ball, and Keltie Knight was showing off plenty of inside cleavage in a red dress.

There are dozens more ladies to discover in this gallery, from the hellaciously hot Heidi Klum to Loren Gray looking electric in neon yellow. From Alexa Bliss baring her belly in a tantalizing two piece to Leighton Meester rocking a black and white wowzer of a dress! There’s a whole bevy of babes waiting to show off their goodies for you in the gallery below!

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Kim K’s Hard Nipples Covered in Jewels For Star-Studded Tiffany Party At Studio 54

Once upon a time, Studio 54 is where sexual fluidity and hedonism reigned supreme. Now it’s host to parties thrown by Tiffany & Co., and nothing says free to be you and me quite like a diamond seller. Kim Kardashian was there sporting a pair of pokies along with a smattering of jewelry that would make Solomon blush.

I used to marvel at how Kim was able to stay in the spotlight, but I now understand it’s the she never leaves it. She hasn’t spent a moment out of the spotlight, which is both admirable and terribly sad. To think that every move you make, every single thing you do, is being watched by people has got to give you more than a little anxiety.

She’s probably got an insulin pump filled with Xanax or something. I don’t know how else you go through the day with everyone watching everything you do and say, and later scrutinizing it in exceedingly dull “think pieces.” Me, I guess I’ll just keep reporting the facts and ruminating on things.

As for Kim, she will continue to serve the lord. The lord being either Satan or Kanye. It’s always been so god damned hard to tell the difference.

[Super Yacht Body Suit Candids From Kim K]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Ariel Winter’s Dynamite Cleavage For Composure Magazine Spread

So, I don’t get a lot of modern art. It doesn’t bother me at all that some stuff in museums flies right over my head. But I do appreciate all the work and the detail that goes into art even when I don’t get it. Same goes for Ariel Winter’s cleavage. I really do appreciate Ariel Winter’s cleavage.

Buddies of mine go on and on about Ariel Winter and her cleavage. I nod along, agree with them, because I totally get it. I can see the awesomeness of Ariel Winter’s cleavage. She works hard at making it look great and that is very much appreciated. Though, I bet she doesn’t have to work all that hard, those boobs are pretty awesome on their own. She really doesn’t need to do much to make them look friggin’ sweet. But when she does, when she’s decked out in sexy clothes, Ariel Winter’s cleavage can look like the best cleavage around.

Take it from me, a leg guy, Ariel Winter has some pretty great cleavage. That’s a solid recommendation, right there. I’m not one of those guys who loves boobs so much they think all boobs are the best. Nope, not me. Ariel Winter, she’s got the cleavage of the Gods, if you ask me. Her legs aren’t half bad, either.

 

Photo Credit: Composure

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Let’s Take A Tour of Kendall Jenner’s Very Sexiest Thong Pictures

Kendall Jenner, the last (relatively) untouched member of the Kardashian/Jenner clan, has an affinity for thongs. Thankfully, we also have an affinity for checking her out in these super hot thong th-thong thong thongs, which is why we’re taking a tour of all her very sexiest thong-clad moments!

You’ve really got to give Kendall credit for not turning into an inflated monster like her sister Kylie. It’s nice that she doesn’t care about having tits so big it looks like you’re smuggling midgets under your shirt. Not enough women are satisfied with their smaller breasts in this day and age, but they’re an absolutely essential component of any society that claims to love boobs.

Like everyone else in her family, Kendall is a master manipulator of social media, meaning that nearly all of these thong pics come directly from her Instagram account, which—truth be told—is a veritable cornucopia of hot thong pics. Man, try saying “hot thong” five times fast. Fun, right?

We love having fun and so does Kendall, so with so much in common, we should definitely get along. Honestly, so long as Kendall’s showing off her beautiful backside in handsomely appointed thongs, our future together seems very bright.

Photo Credit: Instagram 

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Bella Hadid Flaunts Her Faptastic Underboob Action

I’m not sure what the message is that Bella Hadid is sending by wearing a shirt that only covers the top half of her breasts and has the word “FEEL” written on it. Is that an invitation? A commandment? A dare? A challenge? The possibilities we have to ponder are quite limitless.

The younger sister of Gigi Hadid has thrown down the gauntlet on her equally famous sister, and is giving us the opportunity of a lifetime should we happen to encounter Bella Hadid wearing this shirt anywhere in public. She doesn’t seem like the novelty t-shirt type, though.

When I think of Bella Hadid, jeans and novelty t-shirts are not the first things that leap to mind, but so long as that shirt is worn in such a way that her underboob is visible, I’ll absolutely take it.

I feel like this is probably a publicity stunt for some sort of project she’s working on. Feel could be a company or it could be a state of mind. The mysteries presented to us by Bella Hadid in this photo shoot are almost too numerous. I’m going to spend the rest of my night wondering about this whole thing.

[More Sexy Stories From Bella Hadid Right Over Here]

Photo Credit: Splash News / MEGA / FEEL 

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Sharna Burgess Stuns In A Little Dance Bralet and Tights

Golly gee whiz, does this woman wear anything that is not a bralet? I guess given her profession, this is kind of par for the course. It is a perk of her success that she even gets to wear any clothes at all. There are a great number of dancers who have to take off even their bralets if they want any hope of making a buck.

Do not feel too bad for those dancers, they are making bank. A small number you might even call doctor one day, or have them represent you during your inevitable DUI case. In any event, it is admirable work and necessary for a functioning society, so I applaud their perseverance.

Sharna no longer has to worry about skin dancing being her fate. Due to her success on dancing with the stars I think it would take a massive heroin addiction in order for her to wind up on the pole. If she involved any uppers into her routine they could only improve her score, right? I’m no expert in dancing, but it makes sense. I do not see a downer helping her hip hop routine any.

 

 

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Bitch, It’s Bella Thorne’s Birthday—All Her Most Revealing Cleavage Pics For Her Big Day

Bella Thorne is one of those omnipresent people where I couldn’t name you a single movie or television show she’s appeared on. I know she was a Disney kid or whatever, because you can always smell the desperation to shed that wholesome image, but she’s turned it into an art form through her constant social media activity.

According to imdb, she was involved in fifteen different projects this year, which is really something considering that even the handful of those released theatrically were massive bombs. I’m not sure how she stays in the limelight, other than the fact that she’s parlayed her work on social media into enough of a following that she doesn’t have to actually act or perform in things that people will actually watch.

Bella turns 21 today and to celebrate her being officially old enough to drink—which I’m sure she hasn’t done prior to today—we’ve assembled some of her sexiest moments for you. It’s like a Bella Thorne smorgasbord for the biggest Bella Thorne fan in your life, should such a thing exist.

Enjoy some of Bella’s music videos and her sexiest pics from her various social media posts in the gallery below!

Photo Credit: Instagram / YouTube

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Erin Budina Shows Off Her Supple Ass In Curvy Neon Tightsuit

Every year millions of asses go unnoticed in the street and we can all agree that is a tragedy. But there is no longer a need to worry about missing out on even a single pair of buns so long as all women wear Erin Budina’s patented high visibility body suit. Some may claim it is not appropriate for all occasions, but I disagree.

I think we could all go for a little more flare in our lives. Think about how much more entertaining presentations at work would be if the presenter was wearing something like Erin’s. I might actually pay attention to what they are saying and know what is going on at my company.

The making of butts more visible is not just a benefit to the male eye, it is also a safety feature. If drivers are more aware of pedestrians then traffic accidents are going to be much less common. Erin is saving lives out there, but does she ask for any recognition? No.

Well, she does actually want recognition for her ass, but I still think that counts as being pretty selfless.

 

 

Photo Credit: MEGA 

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Sylvie Meis Dazzles and Delights Stripping Out Of Her Little Cutoffs Into A Lavender Bikini

What is the point of wearing cutoffs to the beach if they are only going to be tossed aside once you arrive? If it is for the sake of propriety I think Sylvie needs to up her game because I do not see cutoff jeans preserving much of anything, Does it really feel like they are covering up that much more than bikini bottoms? Being that I have never worn either, I am going to have to defer to the knowledge of the more experienced.

To me it just seems like an unnecessary item to bring along. When I go out I try to limit myself to the bare bones. I do not want not want to worry about unnecessary accessories because in all likelihood they will either be stolen or forgotten.

There are times when I go out during the winter and do not even bring a jacket because I worry that I will lose it in a bar. I know that if I just grit my teeth going to and from the car that I will be okay in a few moments. Besides, I think being cold helps slow down the aging process, so there is that as well.

 

 

Photo Credit: MEGA 

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Claudia Romani Displays Her Sandy Cheeks In Thongtastic Beachside Photo Shoot

Soccer star, superstar, or sand star, I will always be a fan of Claudia Romani. She’s always the prettiest thing on two legs at any beach she steps foot on. She’s like a land mermaid, if that makes any sense. I would really like an opportunity to get active with her. She’s already brought a ball and I’m game. Maybe we can even transition into volleyball right after. Then watch the sunset, and eventually the stars, as the daylight dies and my eternal love for her that I feel inside does not. Claudia in about 30% less clothes found on the average beach-goer is one of my favorite things to look at.

Another option is for both of us to become beach bums. I’m fine with living off the land. I haven’t been too impressed by what they’ve been showing on TV lately anyway so I wouldn’t miss it. But I am impressed with the outline and shape of Claudia. I could watch her all day, with no regrets. Whatever we decide to do on the beach together, she should know that my answer to her would never be no. Because the last thing I would want to see is a frown on my sand princess’ face.

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Shauna Sexton Caught Changing Into A Tight Little Sports Bra

As much as he would love to change the narrative and pretend that he and Jennifer Garner aren’t on the immediate brink of divorce, Ben Affleck’s side chick Shauna Sexton has been seen stopping by his pad to see how rehab is going. Maybe it’s just the boost he needs to dry out finally.

Shauna wasn’t just hanging out at Affleck’s place all week, though, because she stopped by the beach to look sexy in a sports bra also. That’s quite a big week for Shauna, but it’s nice to have her taking some time for herself to run on the beach and change out of her long sleeved shirt into a sports bra.

Who invented the sports bra? These are the things I think about when I see pictures like this. I know I’m not focused on what’s important, but that’s sort of my bag. I get hung up on minutiae constantly. I wonder what she gets hung up on… beside’s Affleck’s dick which I guarantee he calls Matt.

Take that Affleck! You’re not safe from my insults anywhere! Now cry yourself to sleep on your girlfriend’s melons.

[ B E AC H   W E E K  photos from Shauna Sexton]

Photo Credit: Backgrid USA 

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Gorgeous Lady Gaga Spotted Leaving ‘The Late Show’

Already one of the busiest women on the planet, Lady Gaga’s schedule has been jam packed with TV appearances this week in support of her film A Star is Born opening today. Gagaloo stopped by Stephen Colbert’s Late Show last night and showed off a strapless dress with plenty of room for cleavage.

Gaga’s fans are going to be shocked to see their favorite chanteuse stripped down from all her crazy getups and wigs and makeup in the movie. It’s almost cliche to say it at this point, but Gaga’s more than likely on her way to an Oscar nomination for the film because the Academy loves when actresses take off their makeup.

They also love when actresses put on the makeup, as evidenced by Nicole Kidman’s Oscar for her fake nose sporting role in The Hours, or Charlize Theron’s transformation in the murderous Aileen Wuornos in Monster.

Good for Gaga, though, I hope she gets all the accolades in the world for this one because she acts and sings her heart out in the film. If nothing else, she’s definitely well on her way to a People’s Choice award. That’s something.

[The Very Hottest Stuff From Lady Gaga]

Photo Credit: MEGA / Getty Images 

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Lucy Hale’s Tight Front Wedgie Showcase In Sexy Tights

I hate to say it, but cameltoe has lost a little bit of its allure ever since yoga pants hit the market with their blitzkrieg. Growing up it was rare as hell to see a front wedgie on a woman. If you were lucky you might see one on a lady who was wearing ill-fitting sweatpants, but that was a rarity. Sweatpants were usually baggy in order to obscure everything underneath. They were not meant to show more than even the tightest jeans would reveal.

It was during those unexpected camel sightings that we would all thank our lucky stars that Samantha didn’t carefully check her groin before going out that day. In school word would spread around the halls that there was cameltoe and all of us pervs would have to run around in search of it. Once we saw it there was nothing else to do, but we saw it, so what came after did not matter.

But now, I need two hands to keep track of the amount of cameltoe I see every time I go to the gym. I treat their sightings the same way I treat parking tickets. I make a mental note before moving on with my day.

 

Photo Credit: Splash News

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